Chapter XVIII

used before a singular noun to mean one of a group, when it is not a particular one

From this reading These things have only left a blurred impression on my memory, though the anguish at the time was cruel enough.

Extreme physical or mental suffering; intense anguish.

From this reading But what I do remember vividly, as though the agony of it were still with me, is the crying pain at my heart, knowing my father wanted me, had sent for me, and like a fool I wasn't ready for him, had indeed by my imbecile conduct failed him at his need.

used to join words or parts of a sentence that go together

From this reading OUT OF THE FRYING-PAN I don't wish to dwell on the suffering and despair of the next few days.

extreme mental distress

From this reading These things have only left a blurred impression on my memory, though the anguish at the time was cruel enough.

at the same time that; because; in the way that

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

in or near a particular place or position

From this reading These things have only left a blurred impression on my memory, though the anguish at the time was cruel enough.

inflected form of “awake” — stop sleeping

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

in or to or toward a former location

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

having undesirable or negative qualities

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

completely unclothed

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

hard close-grained wood of any of various birch trees; used especially in furniture and interior finishes and plywood

From this reading This was the thought that stung me more than the birch and the shivering cold and the biting hunger: my father needed me, and I had failed him.

capable of wounding

From this reading This was the thought that stung me more than the birch and the shivering cold and the biting hunger: my father needed me, and I had failed him.

indistinct or hazy in outline

From this reading These things have only left a blurred impression on my memory, though the anguish at the time was cruel enough.

the entire physical structure of an organism (an animal, plant, or human being)

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

rectangular block of clay baked by the sun or in a kiln; used as a building or paving material

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

used to introduce something that contrasts with what came before

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

showing who or what does the action

From this reading But what I do remember vividly, as though the agony of it were still with me, is the crying pain at my heart, knowing my father wanted me, had sent for me, and like a fool I wasn't ready for him, had indeed by my imbecile conduct failed him at his need.

A small stone room in a prison where an inmate is locked behind iron bars.

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

having a low or inadequate temperature or feeling a sensation of coldness or having been made cold by e.g. ice or refrigeration

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

direct the course of; manage or control

From this reading But what I do remember vividly, as though the agony of it were still with me, is the crying pain at my heart, knowing my father wanted me, had sent for me, and like a fool I wasn't ready for him, had indeed by my imbecile conduct failed him at his need.

(of persons or their actions) able or disposed to inflict pain or suffering

From this reading These things have only left a blurred impression on my memory, though the anguish at the time was cruel enough.

demanding attention

From this reading But what I do remember vividly, as though the agony of it were still with me, is the crying pain at my heart, knowing my father wanted me, had sent for me, and like a fool I wasn't ready for him, had indeed by my imbecile conduct failed him at his need.

every day; without missing a day

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

slightly wet

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

absence of light or illumination

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

the time during which someone's life continues

From this reading OUT OF THE FRYING-PAN I don't wish to dwell on the suffering and despair of the next few days.

a state in which all hope is lost or absent

From this reading OUT OF THE FRYING-PAN I don't wish to dwell on the suffering and despair of the next few days.

a prescribed selection of foods

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

psychological suffering

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

used to form questions and negatives, and to give emphasis

From this reading But what I do remember vividly, as though the agony of it were still with me, is the crying pain at my heart, knowing my father wanted me, had sent for me, and like a fool I wasn't ready for him, had indeed by my imbecile conduct failed him at his need.

Dictionary entry pending editorial verification. Tap Listen to hear the word.

From this reading OUT OF THE FRYING-PAN I don't wish to dwell on the suffering and despair of the next few days.

think moodily or anxiously about something

From this reading OUT OF THE FRYING-PAN I don't wish to dwell on the suffering and despair of the next few days.

an adequate quantity; a quantity that is large enough to achieve a purpose

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

past form of “fail” — fail to do something; leave something undone

From this reading But what I do remember vividly, as though the agony of it were still with me, is the crying pain at my heart, knowing my father wanted me, had sent for me, and like a fool I wasn't ready for him, had indeed by my imbecile conduct failed him at his need.

extremely hungry

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

a male parent (also used as a term of address to your father)

From this reading But what I do remember vividly, as though the agony of it were still with me, is the crying pain at my heart, knowing my father wanted me, had sent for me, and like a fool I wasn't ready for him, had indeed by my imbecile conduct failed him at his need.

a quantifier that can be used with count nouns and is often preceded by “a”; a small but indefinite number

From this reading OUT OF THE FRYING-PAN I don't wish to dwell on the suffering and despair of the next few days.

beating with a whip or strap or rope as a form of punishment

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

a person who lacks good judgment

From this reading But what I do remember vividly, as though the agony of it were still with me, is the crying pain at my heart, knowing my father wanted me, had sent for me, and like a fool I wasn't ready for him, had indeed by my imbecile conduct failed him at his need.

intended to be given to, or used by, somebody

From this reading But what I do remember vividly, as though the agony of it were still with me, is the crying pain at my heart, knowing my father wanted me, had sent for me, and like a fool I wasn't ready for him, had indeed by my imbecile conduct failed him at his need.

Dictionary entry pending editorial verification. Tap Listen to hear the word.

From this reading OUT OF THE FRYING-PAN I don't wish to dwell on the suffering and despair of the next few days.

-ing form of “gnaw” — bite or chew on with the teeth

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

the past form of “have”, used to form the past perfect

From this reading But what I do remember vividly, as though the agony of it were still with me, is the crying pain at my heart, knowing my father wanted me, had sent for me, and like a fool I wasn't ready for him, had indeed by my imbecile conduct failed him at his need.

consisting of one of two equivalent parts in value or quantity

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

only a very short time before

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

used with a past participle to form the perfect tenses

From this reading These things have only left a blurred impression on my memory, though the anguish at the time was cruel enough.

the locus of feelings and intuitions

From this reading But what I do remember vividly, as though the agony of it were still with me, is the crying pain at my heart, knowing my father wanted me, had sent for me, and like a fool I wasn't ready for him, had indeed by my imbecile conduct failed him at his need.

the male already mentioned, as the object of a verb or preposition

From this reading But what I do remember vividly, as though the agony of it were still with me, is the crying pain at my heart, knowing my father wanted me, had sent for me, and like a fool I wasn't ready for him, had indeed by my imbecile conduct failed him at his need.

belonging to a man, boy, or male animal already mentioned

From this reading But what I do remember vividly, as though the agony of it were still with me, is the crying pain at my heart, knowing my father wanted me, had sent for me, and like a fool I wasn't ready for him, had indeed by my imbecile conduct failed him at his need.

a physiological need for food; the consequence of food deprivation

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

the person speaking or writing, as the subject of the verb

From this reading OUT OF THE FRYING-PAN I don't wish to dwell on the suffering and despair of the next few days.

a person of subnormal intelligence

From this reading But what I do remember vividly, as though the agony of it were still with me, is the crying pain at my heart, knowing my father wanted me, had sent for me, and like a fool I wasn't ready for him, had indeed by my imbecile conduct failed him at his need.

a vague idea in which some confidence is placed

From this reading These things have only left a blurred impression on my memory, though the anguish at the time was cruel enough.

inside something, or within a place, period, or state

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

in truth (often tends to intensify)

From this reading But what I do remember vividly, as though the agony of it were still with me, is the crying pain at my heart, knowing my father wanted me, had sent for me, and like a fool I wasn't ready for him, had indeed by my imbecile conduct failed him at his need.

the form of “be” used with he, she, it, or a singular noun

From this reading But what I do remember vividly, as though the agony of it were still with me, is the crying pain at my heart, knowing my father wanted me, had sent for me, and like a fool I wasn't ready for him, had indeed by my imbecile conduct failed him at his need.

a thing, animal, or idea already mentioned

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

evidencing the possession of inside information

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

location near or direction toward the left side; i.e. the side to the north when a person or object faces east

From this reading These things have only left a blurred impression on my memory, though the anguish at the time was cruel enough.

prefer or wish to do something

From this reading But what I do remember vividly, as though the agony of it were still with me, is the crying pain at my heart, knowing my father wanted me, had sent for me, and like a fool I wasn't ready for him, had indeed by my imbecile conduct failed him at his need.

the act of directing the eyes toward something and perceiving it visually

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

the person speaking, as the object of a verb or preposition

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

The faculty by which the mind stores and remembers information and knowledge.

From this reading These things have only left a blurred impression on my memory, though the anguish at the time was cruel enough.

being nothing more than specified

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

(comparative of “much” used with mass nouns) a quantifier meaning greater in size or amount or extent or degree

From this reading This was the thought that stung me more than the birch and the shivering cold and the biting hunger: my father needed me, and I had failed him.

the time period between dawn and noon

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

belonging to the person speaking

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

a condition requiring relief

From this reading But what I do remember vividly, as though the agony of it were still with me, is the crying pain at my heart, knowing my father wanted me, had sent for me, and like a fool I wasn't ready for him, had indeed by my imbecile conduct failed him at his need.

necessary for relief or supply

From this reading This was the thought that stung me more than the birch and the shivering cold and the biting hunger: my father needed me, and I had failed him.

immediately following in time or order

From this reading OUT OF THE FRYING-PAN I don't wish to dwell on the suffering and despair of the next few days.

Dictionary entry pending editorial verification. Tap Listen to hear the word.

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

and not; used after a negative to add a second negative

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

used to make a word, phrase, or sentence negative

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

belonging to, or connected with, somebody or something

From this reading OUT OF THE FRYING-PAN I don't wish to dwell on the suffering and despair of the next few days.

touching and supported by a surface

From this reading OUT OF THE FRYING-PAN I don't wish to dwell on the suffering and despair of the next few days.

and nothing more

From this reading These things have only left a blurred impression on my memory, though the anguish at the time was cruel enough.

used to join alternatives or possibilities

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

not allowed to continue to bat or run

From this reading OUT OF THE FRYING-PAN I don't wish to dwell on the suffering and despair of the next few days.

a symptom of some physical hurt or disorder

From this reading But what I do remember vividly, as though the agony of it were still with me, is the crying pain at my heart, knowing my father wanted me, had sent for me, and like a fool I wasn't ready for him, had indeed by my imbecile conduct failed him at his need.

involving the body as distinguished from the mind or spirit

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

completely prepared or in condition for immediate action or use or progress

From this reading But what I do remember vividly, as though the agony of it were still with me, is the crying pain at my heart, knowing my father wanted me, had sent for me, and like a fool I wasn't ready for him, had indeed by my imbecile conduct failed him at his need.

To recall to mind.

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

give a certain impression or have a certain outward aspect

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

100 senti equal 1 kroon in Estonia

From this reading But what I do remember vividly, as though the agony of it were still with me, is the crying pain at my heart, knowing my father wanted me, had sent for me, and like a fool I wasn't ready for him, had indeed by my imbecile conduct failed him at his need.

a sensation of cold that often marks the start of an infection and the development of a fever

From this reading This was the thought that stung me more than the birch and the shivering cold and the biting hunger: my father needed me, and I had failed him.

a state of extreme hunger resulting from lack of essential nutrients over a prolonged period

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

the physical property of being inflexible and hard to bend

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

not in physical motion

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

aroused to impatience or anger

From this reading This was the thought that stung me more than the birch and the shivering cold and the biting hunger: my father needed me, and I had failed him.

a state of acute pain

From this reading OUT OF THE FRYING-PAN I don't wish to dwell on the suffering and despair of the next few days.

used to introduce the second part of a comparison

From this reading This was the thought that stung me more than the birch and the shivering cold and the biting hunger: my father needed me, and I had failed him.

used to introduce what somebody said, thought, or felt

From this reading This was the thought that stung me more than the birch and the shivering cold and the biting hunger: my father needed me, and I had failed him.

used before a noun that is already known, already mentioned, or the only one of its kind

From this reading OUT OF THE FRYING-PAN I don't wish to dwell on the suffering and despair of the next few days.

the plural of “this”: the people or things near, or just mentioned

From this reading These things have only left a blurred impression on my memory, though the anguish at the time was cruel enough.

any movable possession (especially articles of clothing)

From this reading These things have only left a blurred impression on my memory, though the anguish at the time was cruel enough.

used for a person or thing that is near, or that has just been mentioned

From this reading This was the thought that stung me more than the birch and the shivering cold and the biting hunger: my father needed me, and I had failed him.

in spite of the fact that

From this reading These things have only left a blurred impression on my memory, though the anguish at the time was cruel enough.

the content of cognition; the main thing you are thinking about

From this reading This was the thought that stung me more than the birch and the shivering cold and the biting hunger: my father needed me, and I had failed him.

an instance or single occasion for some event

From this reading These things have only left a blurred impression on my memory, though the anguish at the time was cruel enough.

used before the base form of a verb to make the infinitive

From this reading OUT OF THE FRYING-PAN I don't wish to dwell on the suffering and despair of the next few days.

in a vivid manner

From this reading But what I do remember vividly, as though the agony of it were still with me, is the crying pain at my heart, knowing my father wanted me, had sent for me, and like a fool I wasn't ready for him, had indeed by my imbecile conduct failed him at his need.

desired or wished for or sought

From this reading But what I do remember vividly, as though the agony of it were still with me, is the crying pain at my heart, knowing my father wanted me, had sent for me, and like a fool I wasn't ready for him, had indeed by my imbecile conduct failed him at his need.

the past form of “be” used with I, he, she, it, or a singular noun

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

Dictionary entry pending editorial verification. Tap Listen to hear the word.

From this reading But what I do remember vividly, as though the agony of it were still with me, is the crying pain at my heart, knowing my father wanted me, had sent for me, and like a fool I wasn't ready for him, had indeed by my imbecile conduct failed him at his need.

the past form of “be” used with you, we, they, or a plural noun

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

used to ask for information about something

From this reading But what I do remember vividly, as though the agony of it were still with me, is the crying pain at my heart, knowing my father wanted me, had sent for me, and like a fool I wasn't ready for him, had indeed by my imbecile conduct failed him at his need.

at the time that

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

used to introduce two or more possibilities

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

hope for; have a wish

From this reading OUT OF THE FRYING-PAN I don't wish to dwell on the suffering and despair of the next few days.

in the company of; together with

From this reading But what I do remember vividly, as though the agony of it were still with me, is the crying pain at my heart, knowing my father wanted me, had sent for me, and like a fool I wasn't ready for him, had indeed by my imbecile conduct failed him at his need.

inside; before a period of time has passed

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.

but in spite of that

From this reading The mere physical distress was bad enough, but looking back I hardly seem to remember the daily flogging, nor the cold and damp of the bare brick cell, nor my stiffness of body when I awoke in the dark not knowing whether it were morning yet or still night-time, nor the hunger gnawing within me, half famished as I was on the starvation diet.