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Jokes For All Occasions Selected and Edited
Jokes For All Occasions Selected and Edited

Chapter I · Chapter 1

Chapter 1 of Jokes For All Occasions Selected and Edited is here in full — 483 sentences across 97 reading sections, with audio for every sentence and word.

Cover illustration for Jokes For All Occasions Selected and Edited
Context Illustration Reading 1/96 · 5 lines
English subtitles · tap any word to listen 1 / 5
_Printed in the United States of America_ The ways of telling a story are as many as the tellers themselves.
It is impossible to lay down precise rules by which any one may perfect himself in the art, but it is possible to offer suggestions by which to guide practise in narration toward a gratifying success.
Broadly distinguished, there are two methods of telling a story.
One uses the extreme of brevity, and makes its chief reliance on the point.
The other devotes itself in great part to preliminary elaboration in the narrative, making this as amusing as possible, so that the point itself serves to cap a climax.
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LEARNER DICTIONARY
Archivist
/ˈɑːrkɪvɪst/
Editorial verification pending

A keeper or guardian of historical records and memories.

Jokes For All Occasions Selected and Edited

Chapter I · Chapter 1

Chapter 1 of Jokes For All Occasions Selected and Edited is here in full — 483 sentences across 97 reading sections, with audio for every sentence and word.

Reading 1/96 · 5 reading units · Lines 1–5

Line 1
_Printed in the United States of America_ The ways of telling a story are as many as the tellers themselves.
/ˈprɪntɪd ɪn ðə juːˈnaɪtɪd steɪts ʌv əˈmerəkə ðə weɪz ʌv ˈtelɪŋ ə ˈstɔːri ɑːr æz ˈmeni æz ðə ˈtelərz ðemˈselvz/
Line 2
It is impossible to lay down precise rules by which any one may perfect himself in the art, but it is possible to offer suggestions by which to guide practise in narration toward a gratifying success.
/ɪt ɪz ˌɪmˈpɑːsəbəl tuː leɪ daʊn prɪˈsaɪs ruːlz baɪ wɪtʃ ˈeni wʌn meɪ pərˈfekt hɪmˈself ɪn ðə ɑːrt bʌt ɪt ɪz ˈpɑːsəbəl tuː ˈɔːfər səˈdʒestʃənz baɪ wɪtʃ tuː ɡaɪd ˈpræktɪs ɪn neˈreɪʃən təˈwɔːrd ə ˈɡrætəfaɪɪŋ səkˈses/
Line 3
Broadly distinguished, there are two methods of telling a story.
/ˈbrɔːdli dɪˈstɪŋɡwɪʃt ðer ɑːr tuː ˈmeθədz ʌv ˈtelɪŋ ə ˈstɔːri/
Line 4
One uses the extreme of brevity, and makes its chief reliance on the point.
/wʌn ˈjuːsəz ðə ekˈstriːm ʌv ˈbrevəti ənd meɪks ɪts tʃiːf rɪˈlaɪəns ɑːn ðə pɔɪnt/
Line 5
The other devotes itself in great part to preliminary elaboration in the narrative, making this as amusing as possible, so that the point itself serves to cap a climax.
/ðə ˈʌðər dɪˈvoʊts ˌɪtˈself ɪn ɡreɪt pɑːrt tuː prɪˈlɪməneri ɪˌlæbərˈeɪʃən ɪn ðə ˈnærətɪv ˈmeɪkɪŋ ðɪs æz əˈmjuːzɪŋ æz ˈpɑːsəbəl soʊ ðæt ðə pɔɪnt ˌɪtˈself sɜːrvz tuː kæp ə ˈklaɪmæks/

Learner Dictionary

These definitions explain words found in the current reading and keep every example grounded in its original sentence.

Oxford-style entry order: headword, part of speech, US IPA, concise definition, contextual example, and audio.

brevity noun US /ˈbrevəti/

the use of brief expressions

From this reading “One uses the extreme of brevity, and makes its chief reliance on the point.”

Broadly adverb US /ˈbrɔːdli/

without regard to specific details or exceptions

From this reading “Broadly distinguished, there are two methods of telling a story.”

devotes verb US /dɪˈvoʊts/

third-person singular of “devote” — give entirely to a specific person, activity, or cause

From this reading “The other devotes itself in great part to preliminary elaboration in the narrative, making this as amusing as possible, so that the point itself serves to cap a climax.”

elaboration noun US /ɪˌlæbərˈeɪʃən/

addition of extra material or illustration or clarifying detail

From this reading “The other devotes itself in great part to preliminary elaboration in the narrative, making this as amusing as possible, so that the point itself serves to cap a climax.”

gratifying adjective US /ˈɡrætəfaɪɪŋ/

pleasing to the mind or feeling

From this reading “It is impossible to lay down precise rules by which any one may perfect himself in the art, but it is possible to offer suggestions by which to guide practise in narration toward a gratifying success.”

narration noun US /neˈreɪʃən/

a message that tells the particulars of an act or occurrence or course of events; presented in writing or drama or cinema or as a radio or television program

From this reading “It is impossible to lay down precise rules by which any one may perfect himself in the art, but it is possible to offer suggestions by which to guide practise in narration toward a gratifying success.”

reliance noun US /rɪˈlaɪəns/

certainty based on past experience

From this reading “One uses the extreme of brevity, and makes its chief reliance on the point.”

tellers noun US /ˈtelərz/

plural of “teller” — United States physicist (born in Hungary) who worked on the first atom bomb and the first hydrogen bomb (1908-2003)

From this reading “_Printed in the United States of America_ The ways of telling a story are as many as the tellers themselves.”

All words in this reading · 73

Every word in these five lines is listed here, and every one of them can be played on its own.

Dictionary details are shown only when verified; these are not licensed Oxford entries.

adeterminerUS /ə/

used before a singular noun to mean one of a group, when it is not a particular one

From this reading _Printed in the United States of America_ The ways of telling a story are as many as the tellers themselves.

AmericanounUS /əˈmerəkə/

North American republic containing 50 states - 48 conterminous states in North America plus Alaska in northwest North America and the Hawaiian Islands in the Pacific Ocean; achieved independence in 1776

From this reading _Printed in the United States of America_ The ways of telling a story are as many as the tellers themselves.

amusingadjectiveUS /əˈmjuːzɪŋ/

providing enjoyment; pleasantly entertaining

From this reading The other devotes itself in great part to preliminary elaboration in the narrative, making this as amusing as possible, so that the point itself serves to cap a climax.

andconjunctionUS /ənd/

used to join words or parts of a sentence that go together

From this reading One uses the extreme of brevity, and makes its chief reliance on the point.

anyadjectiveUS /ˈeni/

one or some or every or all without specification

From this reading It is impossible to lay down precise rules by which any one may perfect himself in the art, but it is possible to offer suggestions by which to guide practise in narration toward a gratifying success.

areauxiliary verbUS /ɑːr/

the form of “be” used with you, we, they, or a plural noun

From this reading _Printed in the United States of America_ The ways of telling a story are as many as the tellers themselves.

artauxiliary verbUS /ɑːrt/

an old form of “are”, used with “thou”

From this reading It is impossible to lay down precise rules by which any one may perfect himself in the art, but it is possible to offer suggestions by which to guide practise in narration toward a gratifying success.

asconjunctionUS /æz/

at the same time that; because; in the way that

From this reading _Printed in the United States of America_ The ways of telling a story are as many as the tellers themselves.

brevitynounUS /ˈbrevəti/

the use of brief expressions

From this reading One uses the extreme of brevity, and makes its chief reliance on the point.

BroadlyadverbUS /ˈbrɔːdli/

without regard to specific details or exceptions

From this reading Broadly distinguished, there are two methods of telling a story.

butconjunctionUS /bʌt/

used to introduce something that contrasts with what came before

From this reading It is impossible to lay down precise rules by which any one may perfect himself in the art, but it is possible to offer suggestions by which to guide practise in narration toward a gratifying success.

byprepositionUS /baɪ/

showing who or what does the action

From this reading It is impossible to lay down precise rules by which any one may perfect himself in the art, but it is possible to offer suggestions by which to guide practise in narration toward a gratifying success.

capnounUS /kæp/

a tight-fitting headdress

From this reading The other devotes itself in great part to preliminary elaboration in the narrative, making this as amusing as possible, so that the point itself serves to cap a climax.

chiefnounUS /tʃiːf/

a person who is in charge

From this reading One uses the extreme of brevity, and makes its chief reliance on the point.

climaxnounUS /ˈklaɪmæks/

the highest point of anything conceived of as growing or developing or unfolding

From this reading The other devotes itself in great part to preliminary elaboration in the narrative, making this as amusing as possible, so that the point itself serves to cap a climax.

devotesverbUS /dɪˈvoʊts/

third-person singular of “devote” — give entirely to a specific person, activity, or cause

From this reading The other devotes itself in great part to preliminary elaboration in the narrative, making this as amusing as possible, so that the point itself serves to cap a climax.

distinguishedadjectiveUS /dɪˈstɪŋɡwɪʃt/

(used of persons) standing above others in character or attainment or reputation

From this reading Broadly distinguished, there are two methods of telling a story.

downadjectiveUS /daʊn/

being or moving lower in position or less in some value

From this reading It is impossible to lay down precise rules by which any one may perfect himself in the art, but it is possible to offer suggestions by which to guide practise in narration toward a gratifying success.

elaborationnounUS /ɪˌlæbərˈeɪʃən/

addition of extra material or illustration or clarifying detail

From this reading The other devotes itself in great part to preliminary elaboration in the narrative, making this as amusing as possible, so that the point itself serves to cap a climax.

extremeadjectiveUS /ekˈstriːm/

of the greatest possible degree or extent or intensity

From this reading One uses the extreme of brevity, and makes its chief reliance on the point.

gratifyingadjectiveUS /ˈɡrætəfaɪɪŋ/

pleasing to the mind or feeling

From this reading It is impossible to lay down precise rules by which any one may perfect himself in the art, but it is possible to offer suggestions by which to guide practise in narration toward a gratifying success.

greatadjectiveUS /ɡreɪt/

relatively large in size or number or extent; larger than others of its kind

From this reading The other devotes itself in great part to preliminary elaboration in the narrative, making this as amusing as possible, so that the point itself serves to cap a climax.

guidenounUS /ɡaɪd/

someone employed to conduct others

From this reading It is impossible to lay down precise rules by which any one may perfect himself in the art, but it is possible to offer suggestions by which to guide practise in narration toward a gratifying success.

himselfpronounUS /hɪmˈself/

used when the man or boy doing the action is also its object

From this reading It is impossible to lay down precise rules by which any one may perfect himself in the art, but it is possible to offer suggestions by which to guide practise in narration toward a gratifying success.

impossibleadjectiveUS /ˌɪmˈpɑːsəbəl/

not capable of occurring or being accomplished or dealt with

From this reading It is impossible to lay down precise rules by which any one may perfect himself in the art, but it is possible to offer suggestions by which to guide practise in narration toward a gratifying success.

inprepositionUS /ɪn/

inside something, or within a place, period, or state

From this reading _Printed in the United States of America_ The ways of telling a story are as many as the tellers themselves.

isauxiliary verbUS /ɪz/

the form of “be” used with he, she, it, or a singular noun

From this reading It is impossible to lay down precise rules by which any one may perfect himself in the art, but it is possible to offer suggestions by which to guide practise in narration toward a gratifying success.

ItpronounUS /ɪt/

a thing, animal, or idea already mentioned

From this reading It is impossible to lay down precise rules by which any one may perfect himself in the art, but it is possible to offer suggestions by which to guide practise in narration toward a gratifying success.

itsdeterminerUS /ɪts/

belonging to the thing or animal already mentioned

From this reading One uses the extreme of brevity, and makes its chief reliance on the point.

itselfpronounUS /ˌɪtˈself/

used when the thing doing the action is also its object

From this reading The other devotes itself in great part to preliminary elaboration in the narrative, making this as amusing as possible, so that the point itself serves to cap a climax.

layverbUS /leɪ/

put into a certain place or abstract location

From this reading It is impossible to lay down precise rules by which any one may perfect himself in the art, but it is possible to offer suggestions by which to guide practise in narration toward a gratifying success.

makesnounUS /meɪks/

plural of “make” — a recognizable kind

From this reading One uses the extreme of brevity, and makes its chief reliance on the point.

makingnounUS /ˈmeɪkɪŋ/

the act that results in something coming to be

From this reading The other devotes itself in great part to preliminary elaboration in the narrative, making this as amusing as possible, so that the point itself serves to cap a climax.

manyadjectiveUS /ˈmeni/

a quantifier that can be used with count nouns and is often preceded by “as” or “too” or “so” or “that”; amounting to a large but indefinite number

From this reading _Printed in the United States of America_ The ways of telling a story are as many as the tellers themselves.

maymodal verbUS /meɪ/

used to say something is possible, or to give permission

From this reading It is impossible to lay down precise rules by which any one may perfect himself in the art, but it is possible to offer suggestions by which to guide practise in narration toward a gratifying success.

methodsnounUS /ˈmeθədz/

plural of “method” — a way of doing something, especially a systematic way; implies an orderly logical arrangement (usually in steps)

From this reading Broadly distinguished, there are two methods of telling a story.

narrationnounUS /neˈreɪʃən/

a message that tells the particulars of an act or occurrence or course of events; presented in writing or drama or cinema or as a radio or television program

From this reading It is impossible to lay down precise rules by which any one may perfect himself in the art, but it is possible to offer suggestions by which to guide practise in narration toward a gratifying success.

narrativenounUS /ˈnærətɪv/

a message that tells the particulars of an act or occurrence or course of events; presented in writing or drama or cinema or as a radio or television program

From this reading The other devotes itself in great part to preliminary elaboration in the narrative, making this as amusing as possible, so that the point itself serves to cap a climax.

ofprepositionUS /ʌv/

belonging to, or connected with, somebody or something

From this reading _Printed in the United States of America_ The ways of telling a story are as many as the tellers themselves.

offerverbUS /ˈɔːfər/

make available or accessible, provide or furnish

From this reading It is impossible to lay down precise rules by which any one may perfect himself in the art, but it is possible to offer suggestions by which to guide practise in narration toward a gratifying success.

onprepositionUS /ɑːn/

touching and supported by a surface

From this reading One uses the extreme of brevity, and makes its chief reliance on the point.

onepronounUS /wʌn/

used to mean any person in general, including the speaker

From this reading It is impossible to lay down precise rules by which any one may perfect himself in the art, but it is possible to offer suggestions by which to guide practise in narration toward a gratifying success.

otheradjectiveUS /ˈʌðər/

not the same one or ones already mentioned or implied

From this reading The other devotes itself in great part to preliminary elaboration in the narrative, making this as amusing as possible, so that the point itself serves to cap a climax.

partnounUS /pɑːrt/

something determined in relation to something that includes it

From this reading The other devotes itself in great part to preliminary elaboration in the narrative, making this as amusing as possible, so that the point itself serves to cap a climax.

perfectadjectiveUS /pərˈfekt/

being complete of its kind and without defect or blemish

From this reading It is impossible to lay down precise rules by which any one may perfect himself in the art, but it is possible to offer suggestions by which to guide practise in narration toward a gratifying success.

pointnounUS /pɔɪnt/

a geometric element that has position but no extension

From this reading One uses the extreme of brevity, and makes its chief reliance on the point.

possibleadjectiveUS /ˈpɑːsəbəl/

capable of happening or existing

From this reading It is impossible to lay down precise rules by which any one may perfect himself in the art, but it is possible to offer suggestions by which to guide practise in narration toward a gratifying success.

practiseverbUS /ˈpræktɪs/

engage in a rehearsal

From this reading It is impossible to lay down precise rules by which any one may perfect himself in the art, but it is possible to offer suggestions by which to guide practise in narration toward a gratifying success.

preciseadjectiveUS /prɪˈsaɪs/

sharply exact or accurate or delimited

From this reading It is impossible to lay down precise rules by which any one may perfect himself in the art, but it is possible to offer suggestions by which to guide practise in narration toward a gratifying success.

preliminaryadjectiveUS /prɪˈlɪməneri/

denoting an action or event preceding or in preparation for something more important

From this reading The other devotes itself in great part to preliminary elaboration in the narrative, making this as amusing as possible, so that the point itself serves to cap a climax.

PrintedverbUS /ˈprɪntɪd/

past form of “print” — put into print

From this reading _Printed in the United States of America_ The ways of telling a story are as many as the tellers themselves.

reliancenounUS /rɪˈlaɪəns/

certainty based on past experience

From this reading One uses the extreme of brevity, and makes its chief reliance on the point.

rulesnounUS /ruːlz/

plural of “rule” — a principle or condition that customarily governs behavior

From this reading It is impossible to lay down precise rules by which any one may perfect himself in the art, but it is possible to offer suggestions by which to guide practise in narration toward a gratifying success.

servesnounUS /sɜːrvz/

plural of “serve” — (sports) a stroke that puts the ball in play

From this reading The other devotes itself in great part to preliminary elaboration in the narrative, making this as amusing as possible, so that the point itself serves to cap a climax.

soconjunctionUS /soʊ/

for that reason; with the result that

From this reading The other devotes itself in great part to preliminary elaboration in the narrative, making this as amusing as possible, so that the point itself serves to cap a climax.

StatesnounUS /steɪts/

plural of “state” — the territory occupied by one of the constituent administrative districts of a nation

From this reading _Printed in the United States of America_ The ways of telling a story are as many as the tellers themselves.

storynounUS /ˈstɔːri/

a message that tells the particulars of an act or occurrence or course of events; presented in writing or drama or cinema or as a radio or television program

From this reading _Printed in the United States of America_ The ways of telling a story are as many as the tellers themselves.

successnounUS /səkˈses/

an event that accomplishes its intended purpose

From this reading It is impossible to lay down precise rules by which any one may perfect himself in the art, but it is possible to offer suggestions by which to guide practise in narration toward a gratifying success.

suggestionsnounUS /səˈdʒestʃənz/

plural of “suggestion” — an idea that is suggested

From this reading It is impossible to lay down precise rules by which any one may perfect himself in the art, but it is possible to offer suggestions by which to guide practise in narration toward a gratifying success.

tellersnounUS /ˈtelərz/

plural of “teller” — United States physicist (born in Hungary) who worked on the first atom bomb and the first hydrogen bomb (1908-2003)

From this reading _Printed in the United States of America_ The ways of telling a story are as many as the tellers themselves.

tellingadjectiveUS /ˈtelɪŋ/

disclosing unintentionally something concealed

From this reading _Printed in the United States of America_ The ways of telling a story are as many as the tellers themselves.

thatconjunctionUS /ðæt/

used to introduce what somebody said, thought, or felt

From this reading The other devotes itself in great part to preliminary elaboration in the narrative, making this as amusing as possible, so that the point itself serves to cap a climax.

thedeterminerUS /ðə/

used before a noun that is already known, already mentioned, or the only one of its kind

From this reading _Printed in the United States of America_ The ways of telling a story are as many as the tellers themselves.

themselvespronounUS /ðemˈselvz/

used when the people doing the action are also its object

From this reading _Printed in the United States of America_ The ways of telling a story are as many as the tellers themselves.

thereadverbUS /ðer/

in or at that place or location

From this reading Broadly distinguished, there are two methods of telling a story.

thisdeterminerUS /ðɪs/

used for a person or thing that is near, or that has just been mentioned

From this reading The other devotes itself in great part to preliminary elaboration in the narrative, making this as amusing as possible, so that the point itself serves to cap a climax.

toparticleUS /tuː/

used before the base form of a verb to make the infinitive

From this reading It is impossible to lay down precise rules by which any one may perfect himself in the art, but it is possible to offer suggestions by which to guide practise in narration toward a gratifying success.

towardprepositionUS /təˈwɔːrd/

in the direction of

From this reading It is impossible to lay down precise rules by which any one may perfect himself in the art, but it is possible to offer suggestions by which to guide practise in narration toward a gratifying success.

twonounUS /tuː/

the cardinal number that is the sum of one and one or a numeral representing this number

From this reading Broadly distinguished, there are two methods of telling a story.

UnitedadjectiveUS /juːˈnaɪtɪd/

characterized by unity; being or joined into a single entity

From this reading _Printed in the United States of America_ The ways of telling a story are as many as the tellers themselves.

usesnounUS /ˈjuːsəz/

plural of “use” — the act of using

From this reading One uses the extreme of brevity, and makes its chief reliance on the point.

waysnounUS /weɪz/

structure consisting of a sloping way down to the water from the place where ships are built or repaired

From this reading _Printed in the United States of America_ The ways of telling a story are as many as the tellers themselves.

whichpronounUS /wɪtʃ/

used to introduce a clause giving more about a thing just mentioned

From this reading It is impossible to lay down precise rules by which any one may perfect himself in the art, but it is possible to offer suggestions by which to guide practise in narration toward a gratifying success.

Chapter 1 of Jokes For All Occasions Selected and Edited by Anonymous holds 483 sentences, grouped into 97 reading sections of at most 5 sentences. The text is the source edition, unabridged, and the chapter records which sentences cover which part of the work so that nothing is dropped. Every word can be tapped for its pronunciation and dictionary entry.

What does chapter 1 of Jokes For All Occasions Selected and Edited contain?

Chapter 1 holds 483 sentences of Jokes For All Occasions Selected and Edited, unabridged, divided into 97 reading sections.

This page carries chapter 1 of Jokes For All Occasions Selected and Edited by Anonymous exactly as it stands in the source edition, without abridgement. It runs to 483 sentences, grouped into 97 sections of at most 5 sentences so that a reader can take the chapter in steady, finishable pieces. The chapter also stores a coverage record mapping every one of its sentences to a part of the work, which is how the edition demonstrates that no line was dropped.

How do I study chapter 1 of Jokes For All Occasions Selected and Edited?

Work through the 97 sections in order, replaying any sentence and tapping unfamiliar words for their entries.

Each of the 97 sections in this chapter is short enough to read once, hear once, and then re-read with the vocabulary in view. Tapping a word plays it alone and opens its dictionary entry with IPA, part of speech and meaning, so the reader is never forced to guess a pronunciation from spelling. Working section by section keeps a long chapter from becoming an undifferentiated wall of text, which is the usual reason a reader abandons a work of this period.

Can chapter 1 be read aloud to me?

Yes — every sentence and every individual word in chapter 1 can be played aloud in United States English.

Audio covers the whole chapter: any sentence can be played, and any single word within it can be played on its own. The voice uses United States English. For a work of this period that matters, because spelling is an unreliable guide to pronunciation for vocabulary that has fallen out of daily use, and a learner who guesses wrong tends to keep the error. Hearing the word in its own sentence, and then alone, settles it.

Questions about reading Jokes For All Occasions Selected and Edited

Common questions about reading Jokes For All Occasions Selected and Edited by Anonymous on this page, its source edition and its audio.

Is this the complete text of Jokes For All Occasions Selected and Edited?

Yes. All 5468 sentences of Project Gutenberg eBook #21084 are kept, with a record of which sentences cover which part.

Which edition of Jokes For All Occasions Selected and Edited is used?

Project Gutenberg eBook #21084, unabridged. The Project Gutenberg header, footer and licence are removed.

How long does Jokes For All Occasions Selected and Edited take to read?

About 455 minutes of reading across 1094 sections of 5 sentences each, at an unhurried pace.

How to read Jokes For All Occasions Selected and Edited section by section

How to work through Jokes For All Occasions Selected and Edited section by section, using the audio and the tap-to-define vocabulary.

  1. Open a chapter

    Choose one of the 13 chapters of Jokes For All Occasions Selected and Edited to begin.

  2. Read one section

    Each section holds 5 sentences; read it once through.

  3. Listen and tap

    Play the section aloud, then tap any unfamiliar word for its entry.

Vocabulary met early in Jokes For All Occasions Selected and Edited

Words and structures a reader meets early in Jokes For All Occasions Selected and Edited, each tappable for pronunciation and meaning.

Printed
A word that appears in the opening chapter of Jokes For All Occasions Selected and Edited; the reader can tap it to hear it and see its dictionary entry.
United
A word that appears in the opening chapter of Jokes For All Occasions Selected and Edited; the reader can tap it to hear it and see its dictionary entry.
States
A word that appears in the opening chapter of Jokes For All Occasions Selected and Edited; the reader can tap it to hear it and see its dictionary entry.
America
A word that appears in the opening chapter of Jokes For All Occasions Selected and Edited; the reader can tap it to hear it and see its dictionary entry.