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The Art of Amusing
The Art of Amusing

Chapter XII

Chapter 12 of The Art of Amusing is here in full — 128 sentences across 26 reading sections, with audio for every sentence and word.

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Context Illustration Reading 1/25 · 5 lines
English subtitles · tap any word to listen 1 / 5
Folly is better than physic.
If no one ever made this aphorism before, we at once lay claim to and include it in our copyright; entered according to act of Congress in the clerk's office, and all the rest of it.
A good old-fashioned time we had of it last Christmas evening at the house of our friend Nix.
What a happy, merry, jolly crowd of noodles, ninnies, judies, tomfools, and undignified people we were to be sure!
Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.
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LEARNER DICTIONARY
Archivist
/ˈɑːrkɪvɪst/
Editorial verification pending

A keeper or guardian of historical records and memories.

The Art of Amusing

Chapter XII

Chapter 12 of The Art of Amusing is here in full — 128 sentences across 26 reading sections, with audio for every sentence and word.

Reading 1/25 · 5 reading units · Lines 1–5

Line 1
Folly is better than physic.
Line 2
If no one ever made this aphorism before, we at once lay claim to and include it in our copyright; entered according to act of Congress in the clerk's office, and all the rest of it.
/ɪf noʊ wʌn ˈevər meɪd ðɪs ˈæfərɪzəm bɪˈfɔːr wiː æt wʌns leɪ kleɪm tuː ənd ˌɪnˈkluːd ɪt ɪn ˈaʊər ˈkɑːpiraɪt ˈentərd əˈkɔːrdɪŋ tuː ækt ʌv ˈkɑːŋɡrəs ɪn ðə klɜːrks ˈɔːfɪs ənd ɔːl ðə rest ʌv ɪt/
Line 3
A good old-fashioned time we had of it last Christmas evening at the house of our friend Nix.
/ə ɡʊd ˌoʊldˈfæʃənd taɪm wiː hæd ʌv ɪt læst ˈkrɪsməs ˈiːvnɪŋ æt ðə haʊs ʌv ˈaʊər frend nɪks/
Line 4
What a happy, merry, jolly crowd of noodles, ninnies, judies, tomfools, and undignified people we were to be sure!
Line 5
Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

Learner Dictionary

These definitions explain words found in the current reading and keep every example grounded in its original sentence.

Oxford-style entry order: headword, part of speech, US IPA, concise definition, contextual example, and audio.

aphorism noun US /ˈæfərɪzəm/

a short pithy instructive saying

From this reading “If no one ever made this aphorism before, we at once lay claim to and include it in our copyright; entered according to act of Congress in the clerk's office, and all the rest of it.”

clerk's noun US /klɜːrks/

possessive form of “clerk” — an employee who performs clerical work (e.g., keeps records or accounts)

From this reading “If no one ever made this aphorism before, we at once lay claim to and include it in our copyright; entered according to act of Congress in the clerk's office, and all the rest of it.”

copyright noun US /ˈkɑːpiraɪt/

a document granting exclusive right to publish and sell literary or musical or artistic work

From this reading “If no one ever made this aphorism before, we at once lay claim to and include it in our copyright; entered according to act of Congress in the clerk's office, and all the rest of it.”

Nix noun US /nɪks/

a quantity of no importance

From this reading “A good old-fashioned time we had of it last Christmas evening at the house of our friend Nix.”

noodles noun US /ˈnuːdəlz/

plural of “noodle” — a ribbonlike strip of pasta

From this reading “What a happy, merry, jolly crowd of noodles, ninnies, judies, tomfools, and undignified people we were to be sure!”

pigment noun US /ˈpɪɡmənt/

dry coloring material (especially a powder to be mixed with a liquid to produce paint, etc.)

From this reading “Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.”

scalding verb US /ˈskɔːldɪŋ/

-ing form of “scald” — subject to harsh criticism

From this reading “Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.”

undignified adjective US /ənˈdɪɡnɪfaɪd/

lacking dignity

From this reading “What a happy, merry, jolly crowd of noodles, ninnies, judies, tomfools, and undignified people we were to be sure!”

Word partnerships in these lines

English keeps certain words together, and knowing the pair is worth more than knowing each word alone. Every partnership below was counted across our whole published library, and earns its place by appearing far more often than two unrelated words of the same frequency would.

Shown as this reading writes them, with the form the library counts, what kind of pairing it is, and how often it occurs.

faint tinge adjective + noun

In this reading “Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.”

next day adjective + noun

In this reading “Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.”

at once preposition + adverb

without delay or hesitation; with no time intervening

In this reading “If no one ever made this aphorism before, we at once lay claim to and include it in our copyright; entered according to act of Congress in the clerk's office, and all the rest of it.”

lay claim verb + noun

demand as being one's due or property; assert one's right or title to

In this reading “If no one ever made this aphorism before, we at once lay claim to and include it in our copyright; entered according to act of Congress in the clerk's office, and all the rest of it.”

whole evening adjective + noun

In this reading “Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.”

rest of verb + particle

In this reading “If no one ever made this aphorism before, we at once lay claim to and include it in our copyright; entered according to act of Congress in the clerk's office, and all the rest of it.”

act of verb + particle

In this reading “If no one ever made this aphorism before, we at once lay claim to and include it in our copyright; entered according to act of Congress in the clerk's office, and all the rest of it.”

crowd of verb + particle

In this reading “What a happy, merry, jolly crowd of noodles, ninnies, judies, tomfools, and undignified people we were to be sure!”

All words in this reading · 104

Every word in these five lines is listed here, and every one of them can be played on its own.

Dictionary details are shown only when verified; these are not licensed Oxford entries.

AdeterminerUS /ə/

used before a singular noun to mean one of a group, when it is not a particular one

From this reading A good old-fashioned time we had of it last Christmas evening at the house of our friend Nix.

accordingadjectiveUS /əˈkɔːrdɪŋ/

(followed by “to”) in agreement with or accordant with

From this reading If no one ever made this aphorism before, we at once lay claim to and include it in our copyright; entered according to act of Congress in the clerk's office, and all the rest of it.

actverbUS /ækt/

perform an action, or work out or perform (an action)

From this reading If no one ever made this aphorism before, we at once lay claim to and include it in our copyright; entered according to act of Congress in the clerk's office, and all the rest of it.

alladjectiveUS /ɔːl/

(quantifier) used with either mass or count nouns to indicate the whole number or amount of or every one of a class

From this reading If no one ever made this aphorism before, we at once lay claim to and include it in our copyright; entered according to act of Congress in the clerk's office, and all the rest of it.

althoughconjunctionUS /ˌɔːlˈðoʊ/

in spite of the fact that

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

andconjunctionUS /ənd/

used to join words or parts of a sentence that go together

From this reading If no one ever made this aphorism before, we at once lay claim to and include it in our copyright; entered according to act of Congress in the clerk's office, and all the rest of it.

aphorismnounUS /ˈæfərɪzəm/

a short pithy instructive saying

From this reading If no one ever made this aphorism before, we at once lay claim to and include it in our copyright; entered according to act of Congress in the clerk's office, and all the rest of it.

atprepositionUS /æt/

in or near a particular place or position

From this reading If no one ever made this aphorism before, we at once lay claim to and include it in our copyright; entered according to act of Congress in the clerk's office, and all the rest of it.

averred

Dictionary entry pending editorial verification. Tap Listen to hear the word.

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

beauxiliary verbUS /biː/

used with a past participle to form the passive, or with -ing for continuous tenses

From this reading What a happy, merry, jolly crowd of noodles, ninnies, judies, tomfools, and undignified people we were to be sure!

beforeprepositionUS /bɪˈfɔːr/

earlier than; in front of

From this reading If no one ever made this aphorism before, we at once lay claim to and include it in our copyright; entered according to act of Congress in the clerk's office, and all the rest of it.

betteradjectiveUS /ˈbetər/

(comparative of “good”) superior to another (of the same class or set or kind) in excellence or quality or desirability or suitability; more highly skilled than another

From this reading Folly is better than physic.

bossnounUS /bɑːs/

a person who exercises control over workers

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

businessnounUS /ˈbɪznəs/

a commercial or industrial enterprise and the people who constitute it

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

cameverbUS /keɪm/

inflected form of “come” — move toward, travel toward something or somebody or approach something or somebody

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

chimney-sweep

Dictionary entry pending editorial verification. Tap Listen to hear the word.

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

ChristmasnounUS /ˈkrɪsməs/

period extending from Dec. 24 to Jan. 6

From this reading A good old-fashioned time we had of it last Christmas evening at the house of our friend Nix.

claimnounUS /kleɪm/

an assertion of a right (as to money or property)

From this reading If no one ever made this aphorism before, we at once lay claim to and include it in our copyright; entered according to act of Congress in the clerk's office, and all the rest of it.

clerk'snounUS /klɜːrks/

possessive form of “clerk” — an employee who performs clerical work (e.g., keeps records or accounts)

From this reading If no one ever made this aphorism before, we at once lay claim to and include it in our copyright; entered according to act of Congress in the clerk's office, and all the rest of it.

conditionnounUS /kənˈdɪʃən/

a state at a particular time

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

CongressnounUS /ˈkɑːŋɡrəs/

the legislature of the United States government

From this reading If no one ever made this aphorism before, we at once lay claim to and include it in our copyright; entered according to act of Congress in the clerk's office, and all the rest of it.

copyrightnounUS /ˈkɑːpiraɪt/

a document granting exclusive right to publish and sell literary or musical or artistic work

From this reading If no one ever made this aphorism before, we at once lay claim to and include it in our copyright; entered according to act of Congress in the clerk's office, and all the rest of it.

crowdverbUS /kraʊd/

cause to herd, drive, or crowd together

From this reading What a happy, merry, jolly crowd of noodles, ninnies, judies, tomfools, and undignified people we were to be sure!

daynounUS /deɪ/

time for Earth to make a complete rotation on its axis

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

dustyadjectiveUS /ˈdʌsti/

covered with a layer of dust

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

earnounUS /iːr/

the sense organ for hearing and equilibrium

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

effortsnounUS /ˈefərts/

plural of “effort” — earnest and conscientious activity intended to do or accomplish something

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

enteredverbUS /ˈentərd/

past form of “enter” — to come or go into

From this reading If no one ever made this aphorism before, we at once lay claim to and include it in our copyright; entered according to act of Congress in the clerk's office, and all the rest of it.

eveningnounUS /ˈiːvnɪŋ/

the latter part of the day (the period of decreasing daylight from late afternoon until nightfall)

From this reading A good old-fashioned time we had of it last Christmas evening at the house of our friend Nix.

everadverbUS /ˈevər/

at any time

From this reading If no one ever made this aphorism before, we at once lay claim to and include it in our copyright; entered according to act of Congress in the clerk's office, and all the rest of it.

eyebrowsnounUS /ˈaɪbraʊz/

plural of “eyebrow” — the arch of hair above each eye

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

faintadjectiveUS /feɪnt/

deficient in magnitude; barely perceptible; lacking clarity or brightness or loudness etc

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

FollynounUS /ˈfɑːli/

the trait of acting stupidly or rashly

From this reading Folly is better than physic.

friendnounUS /frend/

a person you know well and regard with affection and trust

From this reading A good old-fashioned time we had of it last Christmas evening at the house of our friend Nix.

gaveverbUS /ɡeɪv/

inflected form of “give” — cause to have, in the abstract sense or physical sense

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

goodadjectiveUS /ɡʊd/

having desirable or positive qualities especially those suitable for a thing specified

From this reading A good old-fashioned time we had of it last Christmas evening at the house of our friend Nix.

hadauxiliary verbUS /hæd/

the past form of “have”, used to form the past perfect

From this reading A good old-fashioned time we had of it last Christmas evening at the house of our friend Nix.

happyadjectiveUS /ˈhæpi/

enjoying or showing or marked by joy or pleasure

From this reading What a happy, merry, jolly crowd of noodles, ninnies, judies, tomfools, and undignified people we were to be sure!

hepronounUS /hiː/

a man, boy, or male animal already mentioned, as the subject

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

himselfpronounUS /hɪmˈself/

used when the man or boy doing the action is also its object

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

hisdeterminerUS /hɪz/

belonging to a man, boy, or male animal already mentioned

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

honestadjectiveUS /ˈɑːnəst/

not disposed to cheat or defraud; not deceptive or fraudulent

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

housenounUS /haʊs/

a dwelling that serves as living quarters for one or more families

From this reading A good old-fashioned time we had of it last Christmas evening at the house of our friend Nix.

IfconjunctionUS /ɪf/

on condition that; in the event that

From this reading If no one ever made this aphorism before, we at once lay claim to and include it in our copyright; entered according to act of Congress in the clerk's office, and all the rest of it.

inprepositionUS /ɪn/

inside something, or within a place, period, or state

From this reading If no one ever made this aphorism before, we at once lay claim to and include it in our copyright; entered according to act of Congress in the clerk's office, and all the rest of it.

includeverbUS /ˌɪnˈkluːd/

have as a part, be made up out of

From this reading If no one ever made this aphorism before, we at once lay claim to and include it in our copyright; entered according to act of Congress in the clerk's office, and all the rest of it.

India-ink

Dictionary entry pending editorial verification. Tap Listen to hear the word.

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

intoprepositionUS /ˈɪntuː/

moving to the inside of something

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

isauxiliary verbUS /ɪz/

the form of “be” used with he, she, it, or a singular noun

From this reading Folly is better than physic.

itpronounUS /ɪt/

a thing, animal, or idea already mentioned

From this reading If no one ever made this aphorism before, we at once lay claim to and include it in our copyright; entered according to act of Congress in the clerk's office, and all the rest of it.

jollyadjectiveUS /ˈdʒɑːli/

full of or showing high-spirited merriment

From this reading What a happy, merry, jolly crowd of noodles, ninnies, judies, tomfools, and undignified people we were to be sure!

judies

Dictionary entry pending editorial verification. Tap Listen to hear the word.

From this reading What a happy, merry, jolly crowd of noodles, ninnies, judies, tomfools, and undignified people we were to be sure!

lastadjectiveUS /læst/

immediately past

From this reading A good old-fashioned time we had of it last Christmas evening at the house of our friend Nix.

layverbUS /leɪ/

put into a certain place or abstract location

From this reading If no one ever made this aphorism before, we at once lay claim to and include it in our copyright; entered according to act of Congress in the clerk's office, and all the rest of it.

leftnounUS /left/

location near or direction toward the left side; i.e. the side to the north when a person or object faces east

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

likenessnounUS /ˈlaɪknəs/

similarity in appearance or character or nature between persons or things

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

madeadjectiveUS /meɪd/

produced by a manufacturing process

From this reading If no one ever made this aphorism before, we at once lay claim to and include it in our copyright; entered according to act of Congress in the clerk's office, and all the rest of it.

merryadjectiveUS /ˈmeri/

full of or showing high-spirited merriment

From this reading What a happy, merry, jolly crowd of noodles, ninnies, judies, tomfools, and undignified people we were to be sure!

moustaches

Dictionary entry pending editorial verification. Tap Listen to hear the word.

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

nextadjectiveUS /nekst/

immediately following in time or order

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

nightnounUS /naɪt/

the time after sunset and before sunrise while it is dark outside

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

ninnies

Dictionary entry pending editorial verification. Tap Listen to hear the word.

From this reading What a happy, merry, jolly crowd of noodles, ninnies, judies, tomfools, and undignified people we were to be sure!

NixnounUS /nɪks/

a quantity of no importance

From this reading A good old-fashioned time we had of it last Christmas evening at the house of our friend Nix.

nodeterminerUS /noʊ/

not any; not one

From this reading If no one ever made this aphorism before, we at once lay claim to and include it in our copyright; entered according to act of Congress in the clerk's office, and all the rest of it.

noodlesnounUS /ˈnuːdəlz/

plural of “noodle” — a ribbonlike strip of pasta

From this reading What a happy, merry, jolly crowd of noodles, ninnies, judies, tomfools, and undignified people we were to be sure!

ofprepositionUS /ʌv/

belonging to, or connected with, somebody or something

From this reading If no one ever made this aphorism before, we at once lay claim to and include it in our copyright; entered according to act of Congress in the clerk's office, and all the rest of it.

officenounUS /ˈɔːfɪs/

place of business where professional or clerical duties are performed

From this reading If no one ever made this aphorism before, we at once lay claim to and include it in our copyright; entered according to act of Congress in the clerk's office, and all the rest of it.

old-fashionedadjectiveUS /ˌoʊldˈfæʃənd/

out of fashion

From this reading A good old-fashioned time we had of it last Christmas evening at the house of our friend Nix.

onceadverbUS /wʌns/

on one occasion

From this reading If no one ever made this aphorism before, we at once lay claim to and include it in our copyright; entered according to act of Congress in the clerk's office, and all the rest of it.

onepronounUS /wʌn/

used to mean any person in general, including the speaker

From this reading If no one ever made this aphorism before, we at once lay claim to and include it in our copyright; entered according to act of Congress in the clerk's office, and all the rest of it.

orientaladjectiveUS /ˌɔːriˈentəl/

denoting or characteristic of countries of the Far East

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

ourdeterminerUS /ˈaʊər/

belonging to the speaker and others

From this reading If no one ever made this aphorism before, we at once lay claim to and include it in our copyright; entered according to act of Congress in the clerk's office, and all the rest of it.

overprepositionUS /ˈoʊvər/

above and across; more than

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

parboiled

Dictionary entry pending editorial verification. Tap Listen to hear the word.

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

peoplenounUS /ˈpiːpəl/

(plural) any group of human beings (men or women or children) collectively

From this reading What a happy, merry, jolly crowd of noodles, ninnies, judies, tomfools, and undignified people we were to be sure!

physicnoun

a purging medicine; stimulates evacuation of the bowels

From this reading Folly is better than physic.

pigmentnounUS /ˈpɪɡmənt/

dry coloring material (especially a powder to be mixed with a liquid to produce paint, etc.)

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

remainedverbUS /rɪˈmeɪnd/

past form of “remain” — stay the same; remain in a certain state

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

removeverbUS /riˈmuːv/

remove something concrete, as by lifting, pushing, or taking off, or remove something abstract

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

restverbUS /rest/

not move; be in a resting position

From this reading If no one ever made this aphorism before, we at once lay claim to and include it in our copyright; entered according to act of Congress in the clerk's office, and all the rest of it.

scaldingverbUS /ˈskɔːldɪŋ/

-ing form of “scald” — subject to harsh criticism

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

soapnounUS /soʊp/

a cleansing agent made from the salts of vegetable or animal fats

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

stainnounUS /steɪn/

a soiled or discolored appearance

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

sureadjectiveUS /ʃʊr/

having or feeling no doubt or uncertainty; confident and assured

From this reading What a happy, merry, jolly crowd of noodles, ninnies, judies, tomfools, and undignified people we were to be sure!

thanconjunctionUS /ðæn/

used to introduce the second part of a comparison

From this reading Folly is better than physic.

thatconjunctionUS /ðæt/

used to introduce what somebody said, thought, or felt

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

thedeterminerUS /ðə/

used before a noun that is already known, already mentioned, or the only one of its kind

From this reading If no one ever made this aphorism before, we at once lay claim to and include it in our copyright; entered according to act of Congress in the clerk's office, and all the rest of it.

thenadverbUS /ðen/

subsequently or soon afterward (often used as sentence connectors)

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

thisdeterminerUS /ðɪs/

used for a person or thing that is near, or that has just been mentioned

From this reading If no one ever made this aphorism before, we at once lay claim to and include it in our copyright; entered according to act of Congress in the clerk's office, and all the rest of it.

timenounUS /taɪm/

an instance or single occasion for some event

From this reading A good old-fashioned time we had of it last Christmas evening at the house of our friend Nix.

tingenounUS /tɪndʒ/

a slight but appreciable amount

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

toparticleUS /tuː/

used before the base form of a verb to make the infinitive

From this reading If no one ever made this aphorism before, we at once lay claim to and include it in our copyright; entered according to act of Congress in the clerk's office, and all the rest of it.

tomfools

Dictionary entry pending editorial verification. Tap Listen to hear the word.

From this reading What a happy, merry, jolly crowd of noodles, ninnies, judies, tomfools, and undignified people we were to be sure!

underprepositionUS /ˈʌndər/

below or beneath something; less than

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

undignifiedadjectiveUS /ənˈdɪɡnɪfaɪd/

lacking dignity

From this reading What a happy, merry, jolly crowd of noodles, ninnies, judies, tomfools, and undignified people we were to be sure!

unheard-ofadjective

previously unknown

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

washedadjectiveUS /wɑːʃt/

clean by virtue of having been washed in water

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

waternounUS /ˈwɔːtər/

binary compound that occurs at room temperature as a clear colorless odorless tasteless liquid; freezes into ice below 0 degrees centigrade and boils above 100 degrees centigrade; widely used as a solvent

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

wepronounUS /wiː/

the speaker together with one or more other people

From this reading If no one ever made this aphorism before, we at once lay claim to and include it in our copyright; entered according to act of Congress in the clerk's office, and all the rest of it.

wereauxiliary verbUS /wɜːr/

the past form of “be” used with you, we, they, or a plural noun

From this reading What a happy, merry, jolly crowd of noodles, ninnies, judies, tomfools, and undignified people we were to be sure!

WhatpronounUS /wʌt/

used to ask for information about something

From this reading What a happy, merry, jolly crowd of noodles, ninnies, judies, tomfools, and undignified people we were to be sure!

whichpronounUS /wɪtʃ/

used to introduce a clause giving more about a thing just mentioned

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

wholeadjectiveUS /hoʊl/

including all components without exception; being one unit or constituting the full amount or extent or duration; complete

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

withprepositionUS /wɪð/

in the company of; together with

From this reading Nix gave himself unheard-of moustaches and eyebrows with India-ink, and then washed himself into the likeness of a boss chimney-sweep, in which condition he remained the whole evening, and came to business the next day with a faint tinge of the dusty pigment under his left ear, although he averred that he had parboiled himself over night with scalding soap and water in honest efforts to remove the oriental stain.

Chapter 12 of The Art of Amusing by Frank Bellew holds 128 sentences, grouped into 26 reading sections of at most 5 sentences. The text is the source edition, unabridged, and the chapter records which sentences cover which part of the work so that nothing is dropped. Every word can be tapped for its pronunciation and dictionary entry.

What does chapter 12 of The Art of Amusing contain?

Chapter 12 holds 128 sentences of The Art of Amusing, unabridged, divided into 26 reading sections.

This page carries chapter 12 of The Art of Amusing by Frank Bellew exactly as it stands in the source edition, without abridgement. It runs to 128 sentences, grouped into 26 sections of at most 5 sentences so that a reader can take the chapter in steady, finishable pieces. The chapter also stores a coverage record mapping every one of its sentences to a part of the work, which is how the edition demonstrates that no line was dropped.

How do I study chapter 12 of The Art of Amusing?

Work through the 26 sections in order, replaying any sentence and tapping unfamiliar words for their entries.

Each of the 26 sections in this chapter is short enough to read once, hear once, and then re-read with the vocabulary in view. Tapping a word plays it alone and opens its dictionary entry with IPA, part of speech and meaning, so the reader is never forced to guess a pronunciation from spelling. Working section by section keeps a long chapter from becoming an undifferentiated wall of text, which is the usual reason a reader abandons a work of this period.

Can chapter 12 be read aloud to me?

Yes — every sentence and every individual word in chapter 12 can be played aloud in United States English.

Audio covers the whole chapter: any sentence can be played, and any single word within it can be played on its own. The voice uses United States English. For a work of this period that matters, because spelling is an unreliable guide to pronunciation for vocabulary that has fallen out of daily use, and a learner who guesses wrong tends to keep the error. Hearing the word in its own sentence, and then alone, settles it.

Questions about reading The Art of Amusing

Common questions about reading The Art of Amusing by Frank Bellew on this page, its source edition and its audio.

Is this the complete text of The Art of Amusing?

Yes. All 2235 sentences of Project Gutenberg eBook #40309 are kept, with a record of which sentences cover which part.

Which edition of The Art of Amusing is used?

Project Gutenberg eBook #40309, unabridged. The Project Gutenberg header, footer and licence are removed.

How long does The Art of Amusing take to read?

About 186 minutes of reading across 447 sections of 5 sentences each, at an unhurried pace.

How to read The Art of Amusing section by section

How to work through The Art of Amusing section by section, using the audio and the tap-to-define vocabulary.

  1. Open a chapter

    Choose one of the 27 chapters of The Art of Amusing to begin.

  2. Read one section

    Each section holds 5 sentences; read it once through.

  3. Listen and tap

    Play the section aloud, then tap any unfamiliar word for its entry.

Vocabulary met early in The Art of Amusing

Words and structures a reader meets early in The Art of Amusing, each tappable for pronunciation and meaning.

Three
A word that appears in the opening chapter of The Art of Amusing; the reader can tap it to hear it and see its dictionary entry.
Valuable
A word that appears in the opening chapter of The Art of Amusing; the reader can tap it to hear it and see its dictionary entry.
Books
A word that appears in the opening chapter of The Art of Amusing; the reader can tap it to hear it and see its dictionary entry.
Beautifully
A word that appears in the opening chapter of The Art of Amusing; the reader can tap it to hear it and see its dictionary entry.