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The barber's chair
The barber's chair

Chapter XVIII

Chapter 18 of The barber's chair is here in full — 104 sentences across 21 reading sections, with audio for every sentence and word.

Cover illustration for The barber's chair
Context Illustration Reading 1/20 · 5 lines
English subtitles · tap any word to listen 1 / 5
_=NUTTS= reading newspaper; customers drop in._ _Mrs Nutts._ Now, Mr Nutts; will you drag yourself out of that newspaper?
I wish there wasn’t such a thing in the world.
I’m sure a man with his wife and family oughtn’t to waste his time with newspapers.
_Nutts._ (_Laying down paper._) Mrs Nutts--but I’m too melancholy to make a noise.
Be quiet, my dear, can’t you, and let me enjoy my wretchedness?
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AI-generated narration by OpenAI · Slow US English
LEARNER DICTIONARY
Archivist
/ˈɑːrkɪvɪst/
Editorial verification pending

A keeper or guardian of historical records and memories.

The barber's chair

Chapter XVIII

Chapter 18 of The barber's chair is here in full — 104 sentences across 21 reading sections, with audio for every sentence and word.

Reading 1/20 · 5 reading units · Lines 1–5

Line 1
_=NUTTS= reading newspaper; customers drop in._ _Mrs Nutts._ Now, Mr Nutts; will you drag yourself out of that newspaper?
Line 2
I wish there wasn’t such a thing in the world.
Line 3
I’m sure a man with his wife and family oughtn’t to waste his time with newspapers.
Line 4
_Nutts._ (_Laying down paper._) Mrs Nutts--but I’m too melancholy to make a noise.
Line 5
Be quiet, my dear, can’t you, and let me enjoy my wretchedness?

Learner Dictionary

These definitions explain words found in the current reading and keep every example grounded in its original sentence.

Oxford-style entry order: headword, part of speech, US IPA, concise definition, contextual example, and audio.

customers noun US /ˈkʌstəmərz/

plural of “customer” — someone who pays for goods or services

From this reading “_=NUTTS= reading newspaper; customers drop in._ _Mrs Nutts._ Now, Mr Nutts; will you drag yourself out of that newspaper?”

drag verb US /dræɡ/

pull, as against a resistance

From this reading “_=NUTTS= reading newspaper; customers drop in._ _Mrs Nutts._ Now, Mr Nutts; will you drag yourself out of that newspaper?”

enjoy verb US /ˌenˈdʒɔɪ/

derive or receive pleasure from; get enjoyment from; take pleasure in

From this reading “Be quiet, my dear, can’t you, and let me enjoy my wretchedness?”

Laying noun US /ˈleɪɪŋ/

the production of eggs (especially in birds)

melancholy noun US /ˈmelənkɑːli/

a feeling of thoughtful sadness

From this reading “_Nutts._ (_Laying down paper._) Mrs Nutts--but I’m too melancholy to make a noise.”

newspaper noun US /ˈnuːzpeɪpər/

a daily or weekly publication on folded sheets; contains news and articles and advertisements

From this reading “_=NUTTS= reading newspaper; customers drop in._ _Mrs Nutts._ Now, Mr Nutts; will you drag yourself out of that newspaper?”

newspapers noun US /ˈnuːzpeɪpərz/

plural of “newspaper” — a daily or weekly publication on folded sheets; contains news and articles and advertisements

From this reading “I’m sure a man with his wife and family oughtn’t to waste his time with newspapers.”

waste noun US /weɪst/

any materials unused and rejected as worthless or unwanted

From this reading “I’m sure a man with his wife and family oughtn’t to waste his time with newspapers.”

Word partnerships in these lines

English keeps certain words together, and knowing the pair is worth more than knowing each word alone. Every partnership below was counted across our whole published library, and earns its place by appearing far more often than two unrelated words of the same frequency would.

Shown as this reading writes them, with the form the library counts, what kind of pairing it is, and how often it occurs.

make a noise verb + article + noun counted as “make … noise”

In this reading “_Nutts._ (_Laying down paper._) Mrs Nutts--but I’m too melancholy to make a noise.”

in the world preposition + article + noun counted as “in … world”

In this reading “I wish there wasn’t such a thing in the world.”

All words in this reading · 55

Every word in these five lines is listed here, and every one of them can be played on its own.

Dictionary details are shown only when verified; these are not licensed Oxford entries.

adeterminerUS /ə/

used before a singular noun to mean one of a group, when it is not a particular one

From this reading I wish there wasn’t such a thing in the world.

andconjunctionUS /ənd/

used to join words or parts of a sentence that go together

From this reading I’m sure a man with his wife and family oughtn’t to waste his time with newspapers.

Beauxiliary verbUS /biː/

used with a past participle to form the passive, or with -ing for continuous tenses

From this reading Be quiet, my dear, can’t you, and let me enjoy my wretchedness?

butconjunctionUS /bʌt/

used to introduce something that contrasts with what came before

From this reading _Nutts._ (_Laying down paper._) Mrs Nutts--but I’m too melancholy to make a noise.

can't

Dictionary entry pending editorial verification. Tap Listen to hear the word.

From this reading Be quiet, my dear, can’t you, and let me enjoy my wretchedness?

customersnounUS /ˈkʌstəmərz/

plural of “customer” — someone who pays for goods or services

From this reading _=NUTTS= reading newspaper; customers drop in._ _Mrs Nutts._ Now, Mr Nutts; will you drag yourself out of that newspaper?

dearadjectiveUS /dɪr/

dearly loved

From this reading Be quiet, my dear, can’t you, and let me enjoy my wretchedness?

downadjectiveUS /daʊn/

being or moving lower in position or less in some value

From this reading _Nutts._ (_Laying down paper._) Mrs Nutts--but I’m too melancholy to make a noise.

dragverbUS /dræɡ/

pull, as against a resistance

From this reading _=NUTTS= reading newspaper; customers drop in._ _Mrs Nutts._ Now, Mr Nutts; will you drag yourself out of that newspaper?

dropverbUS /drɑːp/

let fall to the ground

From this reading _=NUTTS= reading newspaper; customers drop in._ _Mrs Nutts._ Now, Mr Nutts; will you drag yourself out of that newspaper?

enjoyverbUS /ˌenˈdʒɔɪ/

derive or receive pleasure from; get enjoyment from; take pleasure in

From this reading Be quiet, my dear, can’t you, and let me enjoy my wretchedness?

familynounUS /ˈfæməli/

a social unit living together

From this reading I’m sure a man with his wife and family oughtn’t to waste his time with newspapers.

hisdeterminerUS /hɪz/

belonging to a man, boy, or male animal already mentioned

From this reading I’m sure a man with his wife and family oughtn’t to waste his time with newspapers.

IpronounUS /aɪ/

the person speaking or writing, as the subject of the verb

From this reading I wish there wasn’t such a thing in the world.

I'm

Dictionary entry pending editorial verification. Tap Listen to hear the word.

From this reading I’m sure a man with his wife and family oughtn’t to waste his time with newspapers.

inprepositionUS /ɪn/

inside something, or within a place, period, or state

From this reading _=NUTTS= reading newspaper; customers drop in._ _Mrs Nutts._ Now, Mr Nutts; will you drag yourself out of that newspaper?

LayingnounUS /ˈleɪɪŋ/

the production of eggs (especially in birds)

From this reading _Nutts._ (_Laying down paper._) Mrs Nutts--but I’m too melancholy to make a noise.

letauxiliary verbUS /let/

used to make a suggestion or a command including the speaker

From this reading Be quiet, my dear, can’t you, and let me enjoy my wretchedness?

makeverbUS /meɪk/

engage in

From this reading _Nutts._ (_Laying down paper._) Mrs Nutts--but I’m too melancholy to make a noise.

mannounUS /mæn/

an adult person who is male (as opposed to a woman)

From this reading I’m sure a man with his wife and family oughtn’t to waste his time with newspapers.

mepronounUS /miː/

the person speaking, as the object of a verb or preposition

From this reading Be quiet, my dear, can’t you, and let me enjoy my wretchedness?

melancholynounUS /ˈmelənkɑːli/

a feeling of thoughtful sadness

From this reading _Nutts._ (_Laying down paper._) Mrs Nutts--but I’m too melancholy to make a noise.

MrnounUS /ˈmɪstər/

a form of address for a man

From this reading _=NUTTS= reading newspaper; customers drop in._ _Mrs Nutts._ Now, Mr Nutts; will you drag yourself out of that newspaper?

MrsnounUS /ˈmɪsɪz/

a form of address for a married woman

From this reading _=NUTTS= reading newspaper; customers drop in._ _Mrs Nutts._ Now, Mr Nutts; will you drag yourself out of that newspaper?

mydeterminerUS /maɪ/

belonging to the person speaking

From this reading Be quiet, my dear, can’t you, and let me enjoy my wretchedness?

newspapernounUS /ˈnuːzpeɪpər/

a daily or weekly publication on folded sheets; contains news and articles and advertisements

From this reading _=NUTTS= reading newspaper; customers drop in._ _Mrs Nutts._ Now, Mr Nutts; will you drag yourself out of that newspaper?

newspapersnounUS /ˈnuːzpeɪpərz/

plural of “newspaper” — a daily or weekly publication on folded sheets; contains news and articles and advertisements

From this reading I’m sure a man with his wife and family oughtn’t to waste his time with newspapers.

noisenounUS /nɔɪz/

sound of any kind (especially unintelligible or dissonant sound)

From this reading _Nutts._ (_Laying down paper._) Mrs Nutts--but I’m too melancholy to make a noise.

NowadverbUS /naʊ/

in the historical present; at this point in the narration of a series of past events

From this reading _=NUTTS= reading newspaper; customers drop in._ _Mrs Nutts._ Now, Mr Nutts; will you drag yourself out of that newspaper?

NUTTS

Dictionary entry pending editorial verification. Tap Listen to hear the word.

From this reading _=NUTTS= reading newspaper; customers drop in._ _Mrs Nutts._ Now, Mr Nutts; will you drag yourself out of that newspaper?

ofprepositionUS /ʌv/

belonging to, or connected with, somebody or something

From this reading _=NUTTS= reading newspaper; customers drop in._ _Mrs Nutts._ Now, Mr Nutts; will you drag yourself out of that newspaper?

oughtn't

Dictionary entry pending editorial verification. Tap Listen to hear the word.

From this reading I’m sure a man with his wife and family oughtn’t to waste his time with newspapers.

outadjectiveUS /aʊt/

not allowed to continue to bat or run

From this reading _=NUTTS= reading newspaper; customers drop in._ _Mrs Nutts._ Now, Mr Nutts; will you drag yourself out of that newspaper?

papernounUS /ˈpeɪpər/

a material made of cellulose pulp derived mainly from wood or rags or certain grasses

From this reading _Nutts._ (_Laying down paper._) Mrs Nutts--but I’m too melancholy to make a noise.

quietadjectiveUS /ˈkwaɪət/

characterized by an absence or near absence of agitation or activity

From this reading Be quiet, my dear, can’t you, and let me enjoy my wretchedness?

readingnounUS /ˈriːdɪŋ/

the cognitive process of understanding a written linguistic message

From this reading _=NUTTS= reading newspaper; customers drop in._ _Mrs Nutts._ Now, Mr Nutts; will you drag yourself out of that newspaper?

suchdeterminerUS /sʌtʃ/

of the kind already mentioned

From this reading I wish there wasn’t such a thing in the world.

sureadjectiveUS /ʃʊr/

having or feeling no doubt or uncertainty; confident and assured

From this reading I’m sure a man with his wife and family oughtn’t to waste his time with newspapers.

thatconjunctionUS /ðæt/

used to introduce what somebody said, thought, or felt

From this reading _=NUTTS= reading newspaper; customers drop in._ _Mrs Nutts._ Now, Mr Nutts; will you drag yourself out of that newspaper?

thedeterminerUS /ðə/

used before a noun that is already known, already mentioned, or the only one of its kind

From this reading I wish there wasn’t such a thing in the world.

thereadverbUS /ðer/

in or at that place or location

From this reading I wish there wasn’t such a thing in the world.

thingnounUS /θɪŋ/

a special situation

From this reading I wish there wasn’t such a thing in the world.

timenounUS /taɪm/

an instance or single occasion for some event

From this reading I’m sure a man with his wife and family oughtn’t to waste his time with newspapers.

toparticleUS /tuː/

used before the base form of a verb to make the infinitive

From this reading I’m sure a man with his wife and family oughtn’t to waste his time with newspapers.

tooadverbUS /tuː/

to a degree exceeding normal or proper limits

From this reading _Nutts._ (_Laying down paper._) Mrs Nutts--but I’m too melancholy to make a noise.

wasn't

Dictionary entry pending editorial verification. Tap Listen to hear the word.

From this reading I wish there wasn’t such a thing in the world.

wastenounUS /weɪst/

any materials unused and rejected as worthless or unwanted

From this reading I’m sure a man with his wife and family oughtn’t to waste his time with newspapers.

wifenounUS /waɪf/

a married woman; a man's partner in marriage

From this reading I’m sure a man with his wife and family oughtn’t to waste his time with newspapers.

willmodal verbUS /wɪl/

used to talk about the future, or about willingness

From this reading _=NUTTS= reading newspaper; customers drop in._ _Mrs Nutts._ Now, Mr Nutts; will you drag yourself out of that newspaper?

wishverbUS /wɪʃ/

hope for; have a wish

From this reading I wish there wasn’t such a thing in the world.

withprepositionUS /wɪð/

in the company of; together with

From this reading I’m sure a man with his wife and family oughtn’t to waste his time with newspapers.

worldnounUS /wɜːrld/

everything that exists anywhere

From this reading I wish there wasn’t such a thing in the world.

wretchednessnoun

a state of ill-being due to affliction or misfortune

From this reading Be quiet, my dear, can’t you, and let me enjoy my wretchedness?

youpronounUS /juː/

the person or people being spoken to

From this reading _=NUTTS= reading newspaper; customers drop in._ _Mrs Nutts._ Now, Mr Nutts; will you drag yourself out of that newspaper?

yourselfpronounUS /jərˈself/

used when the person spoken to is also the object of the action

From this reading _=NUTTS= reading newspaper; customers drop in._ _Mrs Nutts._ Now, Mr Nutts; will you drag yourself out of that newspaper?

Chapter 18 of The barber's chair by Douglas William Jerrold holds 104 sentences, grouped into 21 reading sections of at most 5 sentences. The text is the source edition, unabridged, and the chapter records which sentences cover which part of the work so that nothing is dropped. Every word can be tapped for its pronunciation and dictionary entry.

What does chapter 18 of The barber's chair contain?

Chapter 18 holds 104 sentences of The barber's chair, unabridged, divided into 21 reading sections.

This page carries chapter 18 of The barber's chair by Douglas William Jerrold exactly as it stands in the source edition, without abridgement. It runs to 104 sentences, grouped into 21 sections of at most 5 sentences so that a reader can take the chapter in steady, finishable pieces. The chapter also stores a coverage record mapping every one of its sentences to a part of the work, which is how the edition demonstrates that no line was dropped.

How do I study chapter 18 of The barber's chair?

Work through the 21 sections in order, replaying any sentence and tapping unfamiliar words for their entries.

Each of the 21 sections in this chapter is short enough to read once, hear once, and then re-read with the vocabulary in view. Tapping a word plays it alone and opens its dictionary entry with IPA, part of speech and meaning, so the reader is never forced to guess a pronunciation from spelling. Working section by section keeps a long chapter from becoming an undifferentiated wall of text, which is the usual reason a reader abandons a work of this period.

Can chapter 18 be read aloud to me?

Yes — every sentence and every individual word in chapter 18 can be played aloud in United States English.

Audio covers the whole chapter: any sentence can be played, and any single word within it can be played on its own. The voice uses United States English. For a work of this period that matters, because spelling is an unreliable guide to pronunciation for vocabulary that has fallen out of daily use, and a learner who guesses wrong tends to keep the error. Hearing the word in its own sentence, and then alone, settles it.

Questions about reading The barber's chair

Common questions about reading The barber's chair by Douglas William Jerrold on this page, its source edition and its audio.

Is this the complete text of The barber's chair?

Yes. All 3759 sentences of Project Gutenberg eBook #69868 are kept, with a record of which sentences cover which part.

Which edition of The barber's chair is used?

Project Gutenberg eBook #69868, unabridged. The Project Gutenberg header, footer and licence are removed.

How long does The barber's chair take to read?

About 313 minutes of reading across 752 sections of 5 sentences each, at an unhurried pace.

How to read The barber's chair section by section

How to work through The barber's chair section by section, using the audio and the tap-to-define vocabulary.

  1. Open a chapter

    Choose one of the 40 chapters of The barber's chair to begin.

  2. Read one section

    Each section holds 5 sentences; read it once through.

  3. Listen and tap

    Play the section aloud, then tap any unfamiliar word for its entry.

Vocabulary met early in The barber's chair

Words and structures a reader meets early in The barber's chair, each tappable for pronunciation and meaning.

Hedgehog
A word that appears in the opening chapter of The barber's chair; the reader can tap it to hear it and see its dictionary entry.
Letters
A word that appears in the opening chapter of The barber's chair; the reader can tap it to hear it and see its dictionary entry.
Douglas
A word that appears in the opening chapter of The barber's chair; the reader can tap it to hear it and see its dictionary entry.
Jerrold
A word that appears in the opening chapter of The barber's chair; the reader can tap it to hear it and see its dictionary entry.