Complete classic literature • Five-line readings • Clear US narration
VELMORA ACADEMY
Academy of Archival Languages & Memory Studies
Menu Close
The Inventions of the Idiot
The Inventions of the Idiot

Chapter I

Chapter 1 of The Inventions of the Idiot is here in full — 502 sentences across 101 reading sections, with audio for every sentence and word.

Cover illustration for The Inventions of the Idiot
Context Illustration Reading 1/100 · 5 lines
English subtitles · tap any word to listen 1 / 5
Author of "A House-Boat on the Styx" "The Pursuit of the House-Boat" "Olympian Nights" Etc.
Etc.
It was before the Idiot's marriage, and in the days when he was nothing more than a plain boarder in Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog's High-class Home for Single Gentlemen, that he put what the School-master termed his "alleged mind" on plans for the amelioration of the condition of the civilized.
"The trials of the barbarian are really nothing as compared with the tribulations of civilized man," he said, as the waitress passed him a piece of steak that had been burned to a crisp.
"In the Cannibal Islands a cook who would send a piece of broiled missionary to her employer's table in this condition would herself be roasted before another day had dawned.
0:00 / 0:00
Speed 0.75x
AI-generated narration by OpenAI · Slow US English
LEARNER DICTIONARY
Archivist
/ˈɑːrkɪvɪst/
Editorial verification pending

A keeper or guardian of historical records and memories.

The Inventions of the Idiot

Chapter I

Chapter 1 of The Inventions of the Idiot is here in full — 502 sentences across 101 reading sections, with audio for every sentence and word.

Reading 1/100 · 5 reading units · Lines 1–5

Line 1
Author of "A House-Boat on the Styx" "The Pursuit of the House-Boat" "Olympian Nights" Etc.
Line 2
Etc.
Line 3
It was before the Idiot's marriage, and in the days when he was nothing more than a plain boarder in Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog's High-class Home for Single Gentlemen, that he put what the School-master termed his "alleged mind" on plans for the amelioration of the condition of the civilized.
Line 4
"The trials of the barbarian are really nothing as compared with the tribulations of civilized man," he said, as the waitress passed him a piece of steak that had been burned to a crisp.
/ðə ˈtraɪəlz ʌv ðə bɑːrˈberiən ɑːr ˈrɪli ˈnʌθɪŋ æz kəmˈperd wɪð ðə ˌtrɪbjəˈleɪʃənz ʌv ˈsɪvəlaɪzd mæn hiː sed æz ðə ˈweɪtrəs pæst hɪm ə piːs ʌv steɪk ðæt hæd bɪn bɜːrnd tuː ə krɪsp/
Line 5
"In the Cannibal Islands a cook who would send a piece of broiled missionary to her employer's table in this condition would herself be roasted before another day had dawned.
/ɪn ðə ˈkænəbəl ˈaɪləndz ə kʊk huː wʊd send ə piːs ʌv brɔɪld ˈmɪʃəneri tuː hɜːr emˈplɔɪərz ˈteɪbəl ɪn ðɪs kənˈdɪʃən wʊd hərˈself biː ˈroʊstəd bɪˈfɔːr əˈnʌðər deɪ hæd dɔːnd/

Learner Dictionary

These definitions explain words found in the current reading and keep every example grounded in its original sentence.

Oxford-style entry order: headword, part of speech, US IPA, concise definition, contextual example, and audio.

amelioration noun US /əˌmiːljərˈeɪʃən/

the act of relieving ills and changing for the better

From this reading “It was before the Idiot's marriage, and in the days when he was nothing more than a plain boarder in Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog's High-class Home for Single Gentlemen, that he put what the School-master termed his "alleged mind" on plans for the amelioration of the condition of the civilized.”

broiled adjective US /brɔɪld/

cooked by radiant heat (as over a grill)

From this reading “"In the Cannibal Islands a cook who would send a piece of broiled missionary to her employer's table in this condition would herself be roasted before another day had dawned.”

Cannibal noun US /ˈkænəbəl/

a person who eats human flesh

From this reading “"In the Cannibal Islands a cook who would send a piece of broiled missionary to her employer's table in this condition would herself be roasted before another day had dawned.”

employer's noun US /emˈplɔɪərz/

possessive form of “employer” — a person or firm that employs workers

From this reading “"In the Cannibal Islands a cook who would send a piece of broiled missionary to her employer's table in this condition would herself be roasted before another day had dawned.”

Olympian adjective US /oʊˈlɪmpiən/

of the region of Olympia in Greece or its inhabitants

From this reading “Author of "A House-Boat on the Styx" "The Pursuit of the House-Boat" "Olympian Nights" Etc.”

Styx noun US /stɪks/

(Greek mythology) a river in Hades across which Charon carried dead souls

From this reading “Author of "A House-Boat on the Styx" "The Pursuit of the House-Boat" "Olympian Nights" Etc.”

tribulations noun US /ˌtrɪbjəˈleɪʃənz/

plural of “tribulation” — an annoying or frustrating or catastrophic event

From this reading “"The trials of the barbarian are really nothing as compared with the tribulations of civilized man," he said, as the waitress passed him a piece of steak that had been burned to a crisp.”

waitress noun US /ˈweɪtrəs/

a woman waiter

From this reading “"The trials of the barbarian are really nothing as compared with the tribulations of civilized man," he said, as the waitress passed him a piece of steak that had been burned to a crisp.”

Word partnerships in these lines

English keeps certain words together, and knowing the pair is worth more than knowing each word alone. Every partnership below was counted across our whole published library, and earns its place by appearing far more often than two unrelated words of the same frequency would.

Shown as this reading writes them, with the form the library counts, what kind of pairing it is, and how often it occurs.

compared with verb + particle counted as “compare with”

In this reading “"The trials of the barbarian are really nothing as compared with the tribulations of civilized man," he said, as the waitress passed him a piece of steak that had been burned to a crisp.”

civilized man adjective + noun

In this reading “"The trials of the barbarian are really nothing as compared with the tribulations of civilized man," he said, as the waitress passed him a piece of steak that had been burned to a crisp.”

Single Gentlemen adjective + noun counted as “single gentleman”

In this reading “It was before the Idiot's marriage, and in the days when he was nothing more than a plain boarder in Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog's High-class Home for Single Gentlemen, that he put what the School-master termed his "alleged mind" on plans for the amelioration of the condition of the civilized.”

plans for verb + particle counted as “plan for”

In this reading “It was before the Idiot's marriage, and in the days when he was nothing more than a plain boarder in Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog's High-class Home for Single Gentlemen, that he put what the School-master termed his "alleged mind" on plans for the amelioration of the condition of the civilized.”

All words in this reading · 83

Every word in these five lines is listed here, and every one of them can be played on its own.

Dictionary details are shown only when verified; these are not licensed Oxford entries.

AdeterminerUS /ə/

used before a singular noun to mean one of a group, when it is not a particular one

From this reading Author of "A House-Boat on the Styx" "The Pursuit of the House-Boat" "Olympian Nights" Etc.

allegedadjectiveUS /əˈledʒd/

declared but not proved

From this reading It was before the Idiot's marriage, and in the days when he was nothing more than a plain boarder in Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog's High-class Home for Single Gentlemen, that he put what the School-master termed his "alleged mind" on plans for the amelioration of the condition of the civilized.

ameliorationnounUS /əˌmiːljərˈeɪʃən/

the act of relieving ills and changing for the better

From this reading It was before the Idiot's marriage, and in the days when he was nothing more than a plain boarder in Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog's High-class Home for Single Gentlemen, that he put what the School-master termed his "alleged mind" on plans for the amelioration of the condition of the civilized.

andconjunctionUS /ənd/

used to join words or parts of a sentence that go together

From this reading It was before the Idiot's marriage, and in the days when he was nothing more than a plain boarder in Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog's High-class Home for Single Gentlemen, that he put what the School-master termed his "alleged mind" on plans for the amelioration of the condition of the civilized.

anotherdeterminerUS /əˈnʌðər/

one more of the same kind, or a different one

From this reading "In the Cannibal Islands a cook who would send a piece of broiled missionary to her employer's table in this condition would herself be roasted before another day had dawned.

areauxiliary verbUS /ɑːr/

the form of “be” used with you, we, they, or a plural noun

From this reading "The trials of the barbarian are really nothing as compared with the tribulations of civilized man," he said, as the waitress passed him a piece of steak that had been burned to a crisp.

asconjunctionUS /æz/

at the same time that; because; in the way that

From this reading "The trials of the barbarian are really nothing as compared with the tribulations of civilized man," he said, as the waitress passed him a piece of steak that had been burned to a crisp.

AuthornounUS /ˈɔːθər/

writes (books or stories or articles or the like) professionally (for pay)

From this reading Author of "A House-Boat on the Styx" "The Pursuit of the House-Boat" "Olympian Nights" Etc.

barbariannounUS /bɑːrˈberiən/

a member of an uncivilized people

From this reading "The trials of the barbarian are really nothing as compared with the tribulations of civilized man," he said, as the waitress passed him a piece of steak that had been burned to a crisp.

beauxiliary verbUS /biː/

used with a past participle to form the passive, or with -ing for continuous tenses

From this reading "In the Cannibal Islands a cook who would send a piece of broiled missionary to her employer's table in this condition would herself be roasted before another day had dawned.

beenauxiliary verbUS /bɪn/

the past participle of “be”

From this reading "The trials of the barbarian are really nothing as compared with the tribulations of civilized man," he said, as the waitress passed him a piece of steak that had been burned to a crisp.

beforeprepositionUS /bɪˈfɔːr/

earlier than; in front of

From this reading It was before the Idiot's marriage, and in the days when he was nothing more than a plain boarder in Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog's High-class Home for Single Gentlemen, that he put what the School-master termed his "alleged mind" on plans for the amelioration of the condition of the civilized.

boardernounUS /ˈbɔːrdər/

a tenant in someone's house

From this reading It was before the Idiot's marriage, and in the days when he was nothing more than a plain boarder in Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog's High-class Home for Single Gentlemen, that he put what the School-master termed his "alleged mind" on plans for the amelioration of the condition of the civilized.

broiledadjectiveUS /brɔɪld/

cooked by radiant heat (as over a grill)

From this reading "In the Cannibal Islands a cook who would send a piece of broiled missionary to her employer's table in this condition would herself be roasted before another day had dawned.

burnedadjectiveUS /bɜːrnd/

treated by heating to a high temperature but below the melting or fusing point

From this reading "The trials of the barbarian are really nothing as compared with the tribulations of civilized man," he said, as the waitress passed him a piece of steak that had been burned to a crisp.

CannibalnounUS /ˈkænəbəl/

a person who eats human flesh

From this reading "In the Cannibal Islands a cook who would send a piece of broiled missionary to her employer's table in this condition would herself be roasted before another day had dawned.

civilizedadjectiveUS /ˈsɪvəlaɪzd/

having a high state of culture and development both social and technological

From this reading It was before the Idiot's marriage, and in the days when he was nothing more than a plain boarder in Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog's High-class Home for Single Gentlemen, that he put what the School-master termed his "alleged mind" on plans for the amelioration of the condition of the civilized.

comparedverbUS /kəmˈperd/

past form of “compare” — examine and note the similarities or differences of

From this reading "The trials of the barbarian are really nothing as compared with the tribulations of civilized man," he said, as the waitress passed him a piece of steak that had been burned to a crisp.

conditionnounUS /kənˈdɪʃən/

a state at a particular time

From this reading It was before the Idiot's marriage, and in the days when he was nothing more than a plain boarder in Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog's High-class Home for Single Gentlemen, that he put what the School-master termed his "alleged mind" on plans for the amelioration of the condition of the civilized.

cookverbUS /kʊk/

prepare a hot meal

From this reading "In the Cannibal Islands a cook who would send a piece of broiled missionary to her employer's table in this condition would herself be roasted before another day had dawned.

crispadjectiveUS /krɪsp/

(of something seen or heard) clearly defined

From this reading "The trials of the barbarian are really nothing as compared with the tribulations of civilized man," he said, as the waitress passed him a piece of steak that had been burned to a crisp.

dawnedverbUS /dɔːnd/

past form of “dawn” — become clear or enter one's consciousness or emotions

From this reading "In the Cannibal Islands a cook who would send a piece of broiled missionary to her employer's table in this condition would herself be roasted before another day had dawned.

daynounUS /deɪ/

time for Earth to make a complete rotation on its axis

From this reading "In the Cannibal Islands a cook who would send a piece of broiled missionary to her employer's table in this condition would herself be roasted before another day had dawned.

daysnounUS /deɪz/

the time during which someone's life continues

From this reading It was before the Idiot's marriage, and in the days when he was nothing more than a plain boarder in Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog's High-class Home for Single Gentlemen, that he put what the School-master termed his "alleged mind" on plans for the amelioration of the condition of the civilized.

employer'snounUS /emˈplɔɪərz/

possessive form of “employer” — a person or firm that employs workers

From this reading "In the Cannibal Islands a cook who would send a piece of broiled missionary to her employer's table in this condition would herself be roasted before another day had dawned.

Etc

Dictionary entry pending editorial verification. Tap Listen to hear the word.

From this reading Author of "A House-Boat on the Styx" "The Pursuit of the House-Boat" "Olympian Nights" Etc.

forprepositionUS /fɔːr/

intended to be given to, or used by, somebody

From this reading It was before the Idiot's marriage, and in the days when he was nothing more than a plain boarder in Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog's High-class Home for Single Gentlemen, that he put what the School-master termed his "alleged mind" on plans for the amelioration of the condition of the civilized.

GentlemennounUS /ˈdʒentəlmɪn/

plural of “gentleman” — a man of refinement

From this reading It was before the Idiot's marriage, and in the days when he was nothing more than a plain boarder in Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog's High-class Home for Single Gentlemen, that he put what the School-master termed his "alleged mind" on plans for the amelioration of the condition of the civilized.

hadauxiliary verbUS /hæd/

the past form of “have”, used to form the past perfect

From this reading "The trials of the barbarian are really nothing as compared with the tribulations of civilized man," he said, as the waitress passed him a piece of steak that had been burned to a crisp.

hepronounUS /hiː/

a man, boy, or male animal already mentioned, as the subject

From this reading It was before the Idiot's marriage, and in the days when he was nothing more than a plain boarder in Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog's High-class Home for Single Gentlemen, that he put what the School-master termed his "alleged mind" on plans for the amelioration of the condition of the civilized.

herdeterminerUS /hɜːr/

belonging to a woman, girl, or female animal already mentioned

From this reading "In the Cannibal Islands a cook who would send a piece of broiled missionary to her employer's table in this condition would herself be roasted before another day had dawned.

herselfpronounUS /hərˈself/

used when the woman or girl doing the action is also its object

From this reading "In the Cannibal Islands a cook who would send a piece of broiled missionary to her employer's table in this condition would herself be roasted before another day had dawned.

High-classadjective

pretentiously elegant

From this reading It was before the Idiot's marriage, and in the days when he was nothing more than a plain boarder in Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog's High-class Home for Single Gentlemen, that he put what the School-master termed his "alleged mind" on plans for the amelioration of the condition of the civilized.

himpronounUS /hɪm/

the male already mentioned, as the object of a verb or preposition

From this reading "The trials of the barbarian are really nothing as compared with the tribulations of civilized man," he said, as the waitress passed him a piece of steak that had been burned to a crisp.

hisdeterminerUS /hɪz/

belonging to a man, boy, or male animal already mentioned

From this reading It was before the Idiot's marriage, and in the days when he was nothing more than a plain boarder in Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog's High-class Home for Single Gentlemen, that he put what the School-master termed his "alleged mind" on plans for the amelioration of the condition of the civilized.

HomenounUS /hoʊm/

where you live at a particular time

From this reading It was before the Idiot's marriage, and in the days when he was nothing more than a plain boarder in Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog's High-class Home for Single Gentlemen, that he put what the School-master termed his "alleged mind" on plans for the amelioration of the condition of the civilized.

House-Boat

Dictionary entry pending editorial verification. Tap Listen to hear the word.

From this reading Author of "A House-Boat on the Styx" "The Pursuit of the House-Boat" "Olympian Nights" Etc.

Idiot's

Dictionary entry pending editorial verification. Tap Listen to hear the word.

From this reading It was before the Idiot's marriage, and in the days when he was nothing more than a plain boarder in Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog's High-class Home for Single Gentlemen, that he put what the School-master termed his "alleged mind" on plans for the amelioration of the condition of the civilized.

inprepositionUS /ɪn/

inside something, or within a place, period, or state

From this reading It was before the Idiot's marriage, and in the days when he was nothing more than a plain boarder in Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog's High-class Home for Single Gentlemen, that he put what the School-master termed his "alleged mind" on plans for the amelioration of the condition of the civilized.

IslandsnounUS /ˈaɪləndz/

plural of “island” — a land mass (smaller than a continent) that is surrounded by water

From this reading "In the Cannibal Islands a cook who would send a piece of broiled missionary to her employer's table in this condition would herself be roasted before another day had dawned.

ItpronounUS /ɪt/

a thing, animal, or idea already mentioned

From this reading It was before the Idiot's marriage, and in the days when he was nothing more than a plain boarder in Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog's High-class Home for Single Gentlemen, that he put what the School-master termed his "alleged mind" on plans for the amelioration of the condition of the civilized.

mannounUS /mæn/

an adult person who is male (as opposed to a woman)

From this reading "The trials of the barbarian are really nothing as compared with the tribulations of civilized man," he said, as the waitress passed him a piece of steak that had been burned to a crisp.

marriagenounUS /ˈmerɪdʒ/

the state of being a married couple voluntarily joined for life (or until divorce)

From this reading It was before the Idiot's marriage, and in the days when he was nothing more than a plain boarder in Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog's High-class Home for Single Gentlemen, that he put what the School-master termed his "alleged mind" on plans for the amelioration of the condition of the civilized.

mindnounUS /maɪnd/

The element of a person that enables awareness and thought.

From this reading It was before the Idiot's marriage, and in the days when he was nothing more than a plain boarder in Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog's High-class Home for Single Gentlemen, that he put what the School-master termed his "alleged mind" on plans for the amelioration of the condition of the civilized.

missionarynounUS /ˈmɪʃəneri/

someone who attempts to convert others to a particular doctrine or program

From this reading "In the Cannibal Islands a cook who would send a piece of broiled missionary to her employer's table in this condition would herself be roasted before another day had dawned.

moreadjectiveUS /mɔːr/

(comparative of “much” used with mass nouns) a quantifier meaning greater in size or amount or extent or degree

From this reading It was before the Idiot's marriage, and in the days when he was nothing more than a plain boarder in Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog's High-class Home for Single Gentlemen, that he put what the School-master termed his "alleged mind" on plans for the amelioration of the condition of the civilized.

MrsnounUS /ˈmɪsɪz/

a form of address for a married woman

From this reading It was before the Idiot's marriage, and in the days when he was nothing more than a plain boarder in Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog's High-class Home for Single Gentlemen, that he put what the School-master termed his "alleged mind" on plans for the amelioration of the condition of the civilized.

NightsnounUS /naɪts/

Periods of darkness between sunset and sunrise.

From this reading Author of "A House-Boat on the Styx" "The Pursuit of the House-Boat" "Olympian Nights" Etc.

nothingpronounUS /ˈnʌθɪŋ/

not one thing; not anything

From this reading It was before the Idiot's marriage, and in the days when he was nothing more than a plain boarder in Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog's High-class Home for Single Gentlemen, that he put what the School-master termed his "alleged mind" on plans for the amelioration of the condition of the civilized.

ofprepositionUS /ʌv/

belonging to, or connected with, somebody or something

From this reading Author of "A House-Boat on the Styx" "The Pursuit of the House-Boat" "Olympian Nights" Etc.

OlympianadjectiveUS /oʊˈlɪmpiən/

of the region of Olympia in Greece or its inhabitants

From this reading Author of "A House-Boat on the Styx" "The Pursuit of the House-Boat" "Olympian Nights" Etc.

onprepositionUS /ɑːn/

touching and supported by a surface

From this reading Author of "A House-Boat on the Styx" "The Pursuit of the House-Boat" "Olympian Nights" Etc.

passedverbUS /pæst/

past form of “pass” — go across or through

From this reading "The trials of the barbarian are really nothing as compared with the tribulations of civilized man," he said, as the waitress passed him a piece of steak that had been burned to a crisp.

piecenounUS /piːs/

a separate part of a whole

From this reading "The trials of the barbarian are really nothing as compared with the tribulations of civilized man," he said, as the waitress passed him a piece of steak that had been burned to a crisp.

plainadjectiveUS /pleɪn/

clearly revealed to the mind or the senses or judgment

From this reading It was before the Idiot's marriage, and in the days when he was nothing more than a plain boarder in Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog's High-class Home for Single Gentlemen, that he put what the School-master termed his "alleged mind" on plans for the amelioration of the condition of the civilized.

plansnounUS /plænz/

plural of “plan” — a series of steps to be carried out or goals to be accomplished

From this reading It was before the Idiot's marriage, and in the days when he was nothing more than a plain boarder in Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog's High-class Home for Single Gentlemen, that he put what the School-master termed his "alleged mind" on plans for the amelioration of the condition of the civilized.

PursuitnounUS /pərˈsuːt/

the act of pursuing in an effort to overtake or capture

From this reading Author of "A House-Boat on the Styx" "The Pursuit of the House-Boat" "Olympian Nights" Etc.

putverbUS /pʊt/

put into a certain place or abstract location

From this reading It was before the Idiot's marriage, and in the days when he was nothing more than a plain boarder in Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog's High-class Home for Single Gentlemen, that he put what the School-master termed his "alleged mind" on plans for the amelioration of the condition of the civilized.

reallyadverbUS /ˈrɪli/

in accordance with truth or fact or reality

From this reading "The trials of the barbarian are really nothing as compared with the tribulations of civilized man," he said, as the waitress passed him a piece of steak that had been burned to a crisp.

roastedadjectiveUS /ˈroʊstəd/

(meat) cooked by dry heat in an oven

From this reading "In the Cannibal Islands a cook who would send a piece of broiled missionary to her employer's table in this condition would herself be roasted before another day had dawned.

saidadjectiveUS /sed/

being the one previously mentioned or spoken of

From this reading "The trials of the barbarian are really nothing as compared with the tribulations of civilized man," he said, as the waitress passed him a piece of steak that had been burned to a crisp.

School-master

Dictionary entry pending editorial verification. Tap Listen to hear the word.

From this reading It was before the Idiot's marriage, and in the days when he was nothing more than a plain boarder in Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog's High-class Home for Single Gentlemen, that he put what the School-master termed his "alleged mind" on plans for the amelioration of the condition of the civilized.

sendverbUS /send/

cause to go somewhere

From this reading "In the Cannibal Islands a cook who would send a piece of broiled missionary to her employer's table in this condition would herself be roasted before another day had dawned.

SingleadjectiveUS /ˈsɪŋɡəl/

being or characteristic of a single thing or person

From this reading It was before the Idiot's marriage, and in the days when he was nothing more than a plain boarder in Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog's High-class Home for Single Gentlemen, that he put what the School-master termed his "alleged mind" on plans for the amelioration of the condition of the civilized.

Smithers-Pedagog's

Dictionary entry pending editorial verification. Tap Listen to hear the word.

From this reading It was before the Idiot's marriage, and in the days when he was nothing more than a plain boarder in Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog's High-class Home for Single Gentlemen, that he put what the School-master termed his "alleged mind" on plans for the amelioration of the condition of the civilized.

steaknounUS /steɪk/

a slice of meat cut from the fleshy part of an animal or large fish

From this reading "The trials of the barbarian are really nothing as compared with the tribulations of civilized man," he said, as the waitress passed him a piece of steak that had been burned to a crisp.

StyxnounUS /stɪks/

(Greek mythology) a river in Hades across which Charon carried dead souls

From this reading Author of "A House-Boat on the Styx" "The Pursuit of the House-Boat" "Olympian Nights" Etc.

tablenounUS /ˈteɪbəl/

a set of data arranged in rows and columns

From this reading "In the Cannibal Islands a cook who would send a piece of broiled missionary to her employer's table in this condition would herself be roasted before another day had dawned.

termedverbUS /tɜːrmd/

past form of “term” — name formally or designate with a term

From this reading It was before the Idiot's marriage, and in the days when he was nothing more than a plain boarder in Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog's High-class Home for Single Gentlemen, that he put what the School-master termed his "alleged mind" on plans for the amelioration of the condition of the civilized.

thanconjunctionUS /ðæn/

used to introduce the second part of a comparison

From this reading It was before the Idiot's marriage, and in the days when he was nothing more than a plain boarder in Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog's High-class Home for Single Gentlemen, that he put what the School-master termed his "alleged mind" on plans for the amelioration of the condition of the civilized.

thatconjunctionUS /ðæt/

used to introduce what somebody said, thought, or felt

From this reading It was before the Idiot's marriage, and in the days when he was nothing more than a plain boarder in Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog's High-class Home for Single Gentlemen, that he put what the School-master termed his "alleged mind" on plans for the amelioration of the condition of the civilized.

thedeterminerUS /ðə/

used before a noun that is already known, already mentioned, or the only one of its kind

From this reading Author of "A House-Boat on the Styx" "The Pursuit of the House-Boat" "Olympian Nights" Etc.

thisdeterminerUS /ðɪs/

used for a person or thing that is near, or that has just been mentioned

From this reading "In the Cannibal Islands a cook who would send a piece of broiled missionary to her employer's table in this condition would herself be roasted before another day had dawned.

toparticleUS /tuː/

used before the base form of a verb to make the infinitive

From this reading "The trials of the barbarian are really nothing as compared with the tribulations of civilized man," he said, as the waitress passed him a piece of steak that had been burned to a crisp.

trialsnounUS /ˈtraɪəlz/

plural of “trial” — the act of testing something

From this reading "The trials of the barbarian are really nothing as compared with the tribulations of civilized man," he said, as the waitress passed him a piece of steak that had been burned to a crisp.

tribulationsnounUS /ˌtrɪbjəˈleɪʃənz/

plural of “tribulation” — an annoying or frustrating or catastrophic event

From this reading "The trials of the barbarian are really nothing as compared with the tribulations of civilized man," he said, as the waitress passed him a piece of steak that had been burned to a crisp.

waitressnounUS /ˈweɪtrəs/

a woman waiter

From this reading "The trials of the barbarian are really nothing as compared with the tribulations of civilized man," he said, as the waitress passed him a piece of steak that had been burned to a crisp.

wasauxiliary verbUS /wɑːz/

the past form of “be” used with I, he, she, it, or a singular noun

From this reading It was before the Idiot's marriage, and in the days when he was nothing more than a plain boarder in Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog's High-class Home for Single Gentlemen, that he put what the School-master termed his "alleged mind" on plans for the amelioration of the condition of the civilized.

whatpronounUS /wʌt/

used to ask for information about something

From this reading It was before the Idiot's marriage, and in the days when he was nothing more than a plain boarder in Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog's High-class Home for Single Gentlemen, that he put what the School-master termed his "alleged mind" on plans for the amelioration of the condition of the civilized.

whenconjunctionUS /wen/

at the time that

From this reading It was before the Idiot's marriage, and in the days when he was nothing more than a plain boarder in Mrs. Smithers-Pedagog's High-class Home for Single Gentlemen, that he put what the School-master termed his "alleged mind" on plans for the amelioration of the condition of the civilized.

whopronounUS /huː/

which person or people

From this reading "In the Cannibal Islands a cook who would send a piece of broiled missionary to her employer's table in this condition would herself be roasted before another day had dawned.

withprepositionUS /wɪð/

in the company of; together with

From this reading "The trials of the barbarian are really nothing as compared with the tribulations of civilized man," he said, as the waitress passed him a piece of steak that had been burned to a crisp.

wouldmodal verbUS /wʊd/

used for something imagined, polite, or habitual in the past

From this reading "In the Cannibal Islands a cook who would send a piece of broiled missionary to her employer's table in this condition would herself be roasted before another day had dawned.

Chapter 1 of The Inventions of the Idiot by John Kendrick Bangs holds 502 sentences, grouped into 101 reading sections of at most 5 sentences. The text is the source edition, unabridged, and the chapter records which sentences cover which part of the work so that nothing is dropped. Every word can be tapped for its pronunciation and dictionary entry.

What does chapter 1 of The Inventions of the Idiot contain?

Chapter 1 holds 502 sentences of The Inventions of the Idiot, unabridged, divided into 101 reading sections.

This page carries chapter 1 of The Inventions of the Idiot by John Kendrick Bangs exactly as it stands in the source edition, without abridgement. It runs to 502 sentences, grouped into 101 sections of at most 5 sentences so that a reader can take the chapter in steady, finishable pieces. The chapter also stores a coverage record mapping every one of its sentences to a part of the work, which is how the edition demonstrates that no line was dropped.

How do I study chapter 1 of The Inventions of the Idiot?

Work through the 101 sections in order, replaying any sentence and tapping unfamiliar words for their entries.

Each of the 101 sections in this chapter is short enough to read once, hear once, and then re-read with the vocabulary in view. Tapping a word plays it alone and opens its dictionary entry with IPA, part of speech and meaning, so the reader is never forced to guess a pronunciation from spelling. Working section by section keeps a long chapter from becoming an undifferentiated wall of text, which is the usual reason a reader abandons a work of this period.

Can chapter 1 be read aloud to me?

Yes — every sentence and every individual word in chapter 1 can be played aloud in United States English.

Audio covers the whole chapter: any sentence can be played, and any single word within it can be played on its own. The voice uses United States English. For a work of this period that matters, because spelling is an unreliable guide to pronunciation for vocabulary that has fallen out of daily use, and a learner who guesses wrong tends to keep the error. Hearing the word in its own sentence, and then alone, settles it.

Questions about reading The Inventions of the Idiot

Common questions about reading The Inventions of the Idiot by John Kendrick Bangs on this page, its source edition and its audio.

Is this the complete text of The Inventions of the Idiot?

Yes. All 1493 sentences of Project Gutenberg eBook #33623 are kept, with a record of which sentences cover which part.

Which edition of The Inventions of the Idiot is used?

Project Gutenberg eBook #33623, unabridged. The Project Gutenberg header, footer and licence are removed.

How long does The Inventions of the Idiot take to read?

About 124 minutes of reading across 299 sections of 5 sentences each, at an unhurried pace.

How to read The Inventions of the Idiot section by section

How to work through The Inventions of the Idiot section by section, using the audio and the tap-to-define vocabulary.

  1. Open a chapter

    Choose one of the 3 chapters of The Inventions of the Idiot to begin.

  2. Read one section

    Each section holds 5 sentences; read it once through.

  3. Listen and tap

    Play the section aloud, then tap any unfamiliar word for its entry.

Vocabulary met early in The Inventions of the Idiot

Words and structures a reader meets early in The Inventions of the Idiot, each tappable for pronunciation and meaning.

Author
A word that appears in the opening chapter of The Inventions of the Idiot; the reader can tap it to hear it and see its dictionary entry.
House-boat
A word that appears in the opening chapter of The Inventions of the Idiot; the reader can tap it to hear it and see its dictionary entry.
Pursuit
A word that appears in the opening chapter of The Inventions of the Idiot; the reader can tap it to hear it and see its dictionary entry.
Olympian
A word that appears in the opening chapter of The Inventions of the Idiot; the reader can tap it to hear it and see its dictionary entry.